strange?

One thing I realize about myself today is that I get really calm when I am panicking! My voice gets even softer, sweet and I am very accommodating.  But there's a war raging inside my brain! I am panicking inside but my demeanor is very calm and sweet. I don't shout; I don't even move fast because when I panic it usually means there's not much else I can do because I am already deep in the shits...I just accept my fate at this point.