Archives

2017-09-29T05:00:42+02:00

Attached?

Publié par Gaelle.R 29 Septembre 2017 à 05:00 AM

Hi there !

Life is good...how's yours? well things are looking up and I am grateful. So what should I discuss tonight? Okay so I wrote the title before I even decided what I was going to write so I guess I am going to talk about that.

being attached?

Honestly I wouldn't say that I am too attached to anything. I can move on from anything with a little time not so much depends on what it is. For the most part I am never attached to anyone for too long If I see that I am the only one trying best believe it I will move on to something better because I hate to waste my time. I don't like depending on anyone, so this is why I rely on myself and I never let anyone have power over me. I may like someone but I am not in Love. I feel like Love is a form of attachment because you love someone they have power over you and you are depending on them to love you back. What if they don't? unrequited love is my biggest fear. I don't fall in love easily... did I ever fell in love ? I can't recall but anyway I feel like Love is too big, too wide, too fragile and it makes you weak. Don't get me wrong I love my family the love I am talking about is the other kind...the one where you want to get married, have kids and see yourself getting old with that person by your side. Maybe one day I'll get to that point of loving someone like that but for right now everything is just temporary. I am not attached to anyone like that. I love my family and my best friend well she's like a sister to me now but after that...it's a wrap. Man I have been sleeping a lot today so my thoughts are a bit crowded right now ! so I am talking about being attached right... there's nothing wrong with being attached to anyone. You can I am not saying that it's not a good thing. It's just that I have never felt that way so I don't know what I have been missing. Despite everything I think Love is a beautiful thing because I am a hopeless romantic.

Good night y'all, talk soon.

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2017-09-29T04:38:41+02:00

new wave.

Publié par Gaelle.R 29 Septembre 2017 à 04:38 AM

That feeling is been there for so long that it almost felt like it's impossible to get rid of.

It's no longer there but it's hard at times.

The memories don't want to fade away.

I would wake up thinking about you forgetting that you are no longer here with me,

Forgetting that you are from the past.

You are not from this chapter in my life.

It is hard for me when you are still standing close.

I took a step back because I don't want to be a prisoner to this feeling.

I couldn't Ignore it for so long.

Slowly I am returning to my old self as you start fading away.

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2017-09-21T14:43:49+02:00

hello

Publié par Gaelle.R 21 Septembre 2017 à 02:43 PM

update,

so I have been busy with school. Right now I am working on a new project. It's a biography about my life so far. I am not going to publish it yet because I only started it yesterday but so far it's coming alone really well. I have the tendency to start something and leaving it because I lose interest halfway through. This one is about me and about how my life is evolving so there's no way I can lose interest because I am interested about my life right now. So many things are happening but I rather stay on the low and live everything in the moment. I don't want to spoil anything. I hold everything dear because it's the beginning. I am also working on it self help book but I hate to admit that it's a "self help" book because that would mean that I am telling you how to live your life. Maybe I am wrong and I have a feeling that I am because a self help book is suppose to help you help yourself right? but I am still telling you about life. I feel like I haven't really live life fully to help someone but so does everyone. Life just keeps going and we are all realizing things as it goes and so am I. Maybe I should tell someone about what I have learn so far...

one day it will all be published but for now I am working on the low and trying to improve my writing techniques. As you all can see it is not perfect because I am still new but I will get better with time and practice. I am not going to say English is not my first language and that's the reason why because that sounds like an excuse to me. I need to improve if I want to make it as a writer and that's that. I want it so bad that I know for a fact that I will succeed.

have a nice day. Love you all. Talk soon.

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2017-09-15T16:45:33+02:00

under 20 Minutes challenge

Publié par Gaelle.R 15 Septembre 2017 à 04:45 PM

I look in the mirror and all I can see is my enormous eyes,

I am mad because I am still not able to see what is wrong me.

Why such big eyes when I still have no clue about who I am?

What is my purpose?

My small ears cannot hear the echo in my brain telling me what to do in dangerous situations.

I always make the wrong decisions choosing to ignore that voice in my head.

Looking at my head I wonder what goes on inside of it.

Am I smart ?

Why can't I figure this out on my own?

Is my brain not big enough to give me an answer about my own level of intelligence?

Why do I need someone else to tell me my IQ?

I was created with a mind of my own so I should be able to determine this by myself.

I can see them looking at me they must be analyzing my body.

From the way I walk to the way I pause to pick up something from the floor.

They are looking at me because I look different among them.

I know that I am not perfect and I will never be.

My body is flawed with cuts and bruises that the past have left on me.

There is no bandage to cover all the bruises.

I can't wash my flaws in the shower.

I have to live with them for the rest of my life.

My big head, my huge eyes, my small ears and my bruised body define me.

Last week I wanted to change my body.

I started wishing that I had smaller feet but then I see other people with no feet.

so I felt bless to have a feet at all.

I wanted a flatter stomach but then I look at one of my friends and I saw that I am not that big compare to him. So I rejoice and accept my not so big stomach.

I am not happy that I was made this way but I am joyful that I have all the body parts a human should have.

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2017-09-15T01:54:03+02:00

thought this was cute.

Publié par Gaelle.R 15 Septembre 2017 à 01:54 AM

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2017-09-12T02:55:55+02:00

what you see

Publié par Gaelle.R 12 Septembre 2017 à 02:55 AM

You've seen me and you saw how wonderful I can be,

But you never know about those dark times those times where I wish I was never here.

You never knew the times I wanted to walk away but all you see is all the times I stayed and fight.

When you thought I was beautiful I could never believe that I was because the things I was going through were so ugly,

But you will never know.

You saw me laughing but you never knew about all the times that I've cried,

you don't know how many times I fought those tears but they would run down my face anyway.

You can never imagine me that way because you never see that side of me.

If you saw the me that you never see you would change your mind about me.

You wouldn't think I was still beautiful and kind.

You wouldn't think that this was me.

All I think about is how you never know the real me,

The me that keeps me awake at night.

The me that I tried to wash plenty of times in the shower.

That me stays hidden and you will probably never wonder about her.

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2017-09-10T17:54:34+02:00

Decorating..

Publié par Gaelle.R 10 Septembre 2017 à 05:54 PM

Morning !

How are y'all doing? well I am great... I am feeling better as if I was hurting for a while but now my mind is clearer and I can see things in a new light. I am thankful for this feeling because I haven't felt that way for a while now, I always had something bothering me in the back of my mind and right now I don't feel that way.

So I am currently decorating my room from scratch I already got the bed frame now I am working on getting a comfy mattress. I mostly look through pinterest for ideas and the app have been so helpful to me. It's my go to app every time I need ideas on something new such as hairstyles even though I always ending up coming up with something that I thought about before going on the app but it is nice to see other ideas from other people. I also look up how other people match their clothes... My style is unique from school girl to street style and casual... I love switching things around. I am a modern day woman. Lol I said I'm a woman well I am becoming one each day that goes by and every responsibility I take I become older and more mature. Back to my room well... I need a nice carpet made out of fur and a dresser that matches the color of my bed. I will need some picture frame to put some art that I have on my phone... I will need to print them out I publish one of them here... I it's beautiful it will be up on the wall above my bed. Gosh I am so excited.

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2017-09-10T17:53:40+02:00

Love this so much !! It will soon be on my wall

Publié par Gaelle.R 10 Septembre 2017 à 05:53 PM

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2017-09-09T03:39:35+02:00

Being black.

Publié par Gaelle.R 9 Septembre 2017 à 03:39 AM

hello there,

I am switching things around here. I am allowed to do that because this is my platform and I will always use it to voice out my opinion and my cries of outrage. Well this topic is no surprises to anyone because I am part of the black community but I think I should have a say in the things that are now happening. First of all I am happy that hurricane Irma didn't do much damage in my Country just a lot of rain but nothing really major... Let's get into the topic.

I am 100% black all my family is black some may be mixed but I am not. I am fully black and being raised in a Country where everyone else was black there wasn't much difference to me. But coming here to America I realize that it matters I know that there is different shade there's lightskin, darkskin, brownskin (...) I did not care about all that. I mean I know that there is different shades of black but I've always thought that we are all beautiful. Now I am not saying that other girls are not beautiful some may talk about latinas and say they went to the same things that I am about to discuss but this is not about white girls, latinas or any other I am talking about us black girls. Just for once let us have a moment to ourselves. when I say "black lives matter" I am not saying that other lives don't matter reason why we emphasize on "black lives matter" is only because we've been treated like trash in multiple case and we are tired of all the acts of injustice and so we start this movement to remind other people that we matter too.

I went to a all white school when I first came here, there was literally very few blacks. I started to realize that there is a difference between us. Now I am about to say why I believe black girls are all beautiful no matter their skin tones and whether they are mixed or not... we all sometimes slept on but not entirely forgotten because most of the successful, richest women are black and they are now trending don't let me started on who they are because y'all know I mean I could go go on . But I am beyond proud of Rihanna on her beauty line she went all the way to make us all of us feel special. I think some people are intimidated by us black women because believe me we are gorgeous, powerful and we are always glowing. some of us highlight be always poppin' like girl yass. I am proud of black girls who are independent and working hard trying to make it with our own strength. Most of us are being judged because we have an opinion and we are not afraid to stand by it. I am happy that we are starting to love ourselves more and being proud of our natural hair. Natural hair is trending and I love that because I fell in love with my natural hair recently and let me tell you I felt more like myself ever since I started working with my natural hair.

what I hate the most is when some guys ahem (kodack black) are acting like lightskin girls are better... Keep that to yourself because that seems like a personal problem ain't nobody care about it. Talking about how some shades are better ... boy bye that's what I say we are all beautiful and for you darkskin and chocolate beauty keep doing you, keep on shining melanin be always on point and you can rock any colors you want. We are beautiful period.

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2017-09-05T15:14:35+02:00

How it goes...

Publié par Gaelle.R 5 Septembre 2017 à 03:14 PM

Morning!

To new beginning,

I am restarting my life well in some areas...I am trying to change certain things for the better. I claim that I don't like changes but yet I switch my life around and I am more than happy to do it even though it requires a lot of sacrifices from me.

Well enough about me and my changed life...Hurricane Irma is taking over the Islands especially where I was born ...I am extremely sad about this because it's going to ruin everything they've worked for I mean we've already had an earthquake and a big one, one that killed thousands of people and some are still missing possibly dead. I really hope this hurricane is not just as bad because that would be the end for the Country.

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