Anger problems

I think one of the things people would be surprise to know about me is that I have a little anger problem. It doesn't show the way most people might expect, I won't say anything, I won't scream but I might break some things...I just act on it. It can be scary because most people expect me to be sweet, kind and gentle but I am not always like that. There is a reason why I run away from confrontation, and change the subject when I am getting mad. I am not a nice person when I am mad and I hate who I am when I am mad. I can be filled with rage and I hate that feeling because anything is possible. There is a reason why I always deescalated the situation by walking away, I know what I am capable of and how much I can hurt someone's feelings with my words. So I keep my mouth shut and walk away. 

I have been working  to have self control ever since I was little, I did 2 things out of anger that almost changed the trajectory of my life, only my mom know about one and the other one only me and the person knew but he died (that was my beloved cousin who I love like a brother, he created this blog for me. I love him so much. I miss him)

All this to say please leave me alone when I am mad, don't let my innocent face trick you I am not always nice.