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2023-02-13T03:10:22+01:00
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2023-02-12T19:04:57+01:00
2023-02-12T01:06:12+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
I have those days where I think perhaps I am not doing the best that I can , or that I am not enough for some people but the hell with them!
if I get to find any ounce of pleasure in anything at the moment then I know I am doing the best that I can. Why should I worry if someone doesn’t like me? Why should I worry if they don’t think I am enough?
I am enough for me and that’s what matters; I admit I don’t always see everything so positively. Some days I want to crawl under the covers and never let anyone see me again. I often criticize myself and see my flaws a lot bigger than they are. But each day that goes by I fall more in love with myself, each time I had to put all the broken pieces back together I know that something has to change and I am willing to make those changes.
2023-02-12T00:44:33+01:00
2023-02-11T16:09:11+01:00
2023-02-10T17:53:55+01:00
things that I need to stop doing in 2023.
we all have bad habits and things that we do that we know we should not be doing. let's create a list of things that we want to change about ourselves as we are about to enter the 3rd month of 2023. Although this list may seem shallow to some but to me, those things mean a lot to me.
- looking for food only when I am bout to pass out. The fact that I know that I should eat 3 times a day doesn't mean that I do it, truth is most of the time I only eat when I feel lightheaded or cannot hold my hunger for 1 minute longer. I need better eating habits.
- stop letting my cats ravage my house. I know I should stop them or discipline them but after I get home from work all I want to do is sleep and just not do anything so I let them do whatever they want. They love it but to the detriment of myself.
- start journaling again. I haven't written anything in my journal since September of 2022, am I avoiding my feelings? yes but I am not doing anything about it. I want to start journaling again and not avoid my feelings.
- I need to neuter Pixie, I haven't gotten around to that because I have been so busy with my own problems but the truth is he can have babies and that's not good. Even if he still acts like a baby but I know deep down he wants to do the deed.
- start giving boys a chance. In the past, I've always shut them down before I get to know them but I am going to give someone a chance this year... maybe I'll start dating.
2023-02-10T05:18:44+01:00
2023-02-10T04:15:46+01:00
2023-02-09T01:53:24+01:00
2023-02-09T01:39:57+01:00
creating my dream boyfriend.
I wish I could create my own boyfriend like you do in a video game, I would pick all of his qualities and height. Let's create the best boyfriend ever with me by the way this is just to play pretend; I don't think anyone like that exists but I could be wrong. Okay so here's my idea of the best boyfriend.
- writes me love letters.
- make playlists for me specifically on Spotify since that's what I always use.
- gives me a cute nickname.
- create a handshake just for us
- and randomly gives me flowers.
- ask me to dance when we're alone because I don't think I am brave enough to dance in front of people yet.
- kiss me in the rain, it is such a Disney thing but I want to do it :)
- let me wear his hoodie.
- text me first.
- fix my hair since it's always messed up lol.
- compliments my hair always
- love football just like me if not more.
- watch football with me and never watch a game without me
- always send morning and goodnight text
- and deep conversations about various topics
- cares about mental health and would be open to going to therapy if needed.
- brags about me
- post pictures of us but without our faces showing (no face no case let's make people guess)
- maintaining eye contact always, it's intimidating but I like someone who's not scared to look me straight in the eyes. I love it
- love cuddling
- love cats, specifically my cats and treat them like his babies too. Gosh, I would be so in love I would want to marry him right away!
- love to blast music in the car and sing at the top of our lungs.
- bring me food always
- let me win games when we play video games even when I know he's better than me but that would make me love him more.
- plays with my hair
- play fighting/ wrestling
- take pictures together
- willing to travel together. I want to travel but I hate to do it alone (eventually I will have to do it)
- ask " can I call you"
- ask " can I kiss you"
- calls me beautiful
- slow dances
- hold my hand in public
- treats me like a queen because he will be my king ( so cringe I love it lol )
- loves cartoon just like me
- and engage in deep discussion about soccer... I love that I could go on for hours;
- treats me with utmost respect and care
- write me a long text saying what he likes most about me (I will do the same)
- get matching outfits just because.
- ask to facetime me (I don't like facetime but I would do it just for him)
- bring presents for my cats (omg I would be so in love lol)
- ask about my cats.
- hopefully, he is a die-hard Brazil fan and not an Argentina fan but as long as he understands the rivalry we're good.
- very attentive to my well-being as I will care for him just the same.
- love to read books or at least read often
- spiritual
- prays with me every day.
- stay on the phone until I fall asleep
- hold me when I am sad and cheer me up with things I like.
- plays with my cats.