Publié depuis Eklablog

I have talked about this topic before and this probably won't be the last time that I will talk about it. so, Here we go again with the topic of hair. In 2016 I made the conscious decision to go completely natural, I remember I used to always use a texturizer on my hair to make it straight ever since I was in the 6th grade. So basically I haven't seen my natural hair since I was 12 or 11 but in 2016 at the age of 19 I decided to went completely natural and my mom was pissed. I had my mini afro because my hair broke off from all the damages of the perm so my hair was shorter than usual. My mom told me that I was making a big mistake and that it looked ugly; I remember crying after she told me that because that was my hair but she wanted me to texturized it and make it straight. I listen to her and put a texturizer in my hair once again, but right after I did it I felt ashamed ! and I started crying. My hair was pretty, long and straight but that's not what I wanted, I wanted to love my natural self without rectifying anything. I didn't like my hair and one would argue that because I hated my hair, I put the most ridiculous vibrant hair color you could find to mask all of that hatred which is why I dyed my hair red that year.

After that year I decided to went completely natural again the following year in 2017 and I didn't listen to anyone telling me how short my hair was because I did cut it myself for the first time. I did not understand why society made me feel like not having long, straight hair was a problem at the time. For starters I did fall in love with my cute afro in 2017 after living with 2 beautiful women who really took care of their natural hair and so I did follow their footsteps. At the time a lot of people was doing the big chop on YouTube and falling in love with their natural hair, so I started following women who had the same hair texture as me and I felt right at home. My hair grew into a very healthy and big beautiful afro, it was my pride and joy but I started feeling like I needed a change so I started wearing wigs in 2018. I would switch up my style when I wanted straight hair because I hated putting heat in my own hair. Then I fell in love with wigs because it was more convenient for me when I was tired of doing my hair I could just braid it and put on a beautiful wig. Then I saw women getting criticized for wearing wigs on social media and mostly by the black men! They were saying girls who were wigs are insecure, they are bald, they have no edges... blah blah... and I was none of those things! I remember one time I took off my wig and did my hair in a big beautiful afro and some people were coming up to me and telling me " wow you have hair!? I thought you were bald!" I was appalled I hated the fact that I couldn't just put on a wig whenever  I felt like it without getting backlashed or criticized !

Here we are in 2022 and a lot has changed; I got tired of my big beautiful afro in 2020 after the pandemic and put a texturizer in my hair which I grew to regret when my hair started falling out. I had no choice than to cut off all my hair in 2021. I had a buzzcut and at first I felt POWERFUL and I felt free because my hair wasn't falling out anymore. I still felt beautiful even though I kind of felt like GI Jane but I wouldn't dare leave my house with my buzzcut because I was afraid of what people would say but after a while I just simply did not care. My hair started growing and now I can put it in a bun. I still wear wigs whenever I want to and I don't give a bread of what people says, I love my beautiful hair and I love wearing wigs when I want to. If you can't deal with it then leave me alone because there's more to life than hair.