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2023-12-03T17:22:04+01:00
Archives
2023-12-03T13:07:40+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
How to detach from someone.
When I detach from someone that person no longer exist to me. Because I see myself as the main character in my story you can only exist if I want you there (I am a writer so it’s only fitting) I even forget the names or anything that they told me. When I have to detach to someone is usually when I realize their time in my life is done or I tested them multiple times and they failed constantly. I know that it is no one’s job to make me happy or to give me what I want. It is my job to make myself happy and to give myself what I deserve.
If someone is not treating you well, you have to remind yourself that you have 2 choices: you can either stay and endure the treatment hoping that things will change one day or you can walk away and give yourself the love that you deserve while you wait for the right person to love you better.
There is more to life than a relationship, you have to remember that the only way for you to find yourself is alone. No one is going to come and save you; you have to be strong and create the best environment for you to thrive.
If someone doesn’t appreciate you or chose someone else over you then walk away, that person never deserve you. When you can’t be friends with someone or can’t have any type of relationship with someone it normally means that this person is not the one for you; which is okay because we were all made for someone or for a purpose.
Keep working hard, travel the world, meet new people, open up your horizon, meet people from different countries and see how your life will change !
2023-12-03T01:16:57+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Best movies I am never tired of
1. 10 things I hate about you.
2. Love jones
3. the parent trap (with Lindsay Lohan)
4. Flipped !
5. Lucy ( that movie is phenomenal I can watch it 10 times a day!)
2023-12-02T18:03:01+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
December is here!!!!
I’ve been so burnout I didn’t notice!!! Ong I’m so happy knowing what I am about to in a week omg g!!!
2023-12-02T16:47:11+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
A tragic end.
Oh boy, I don’t think I talked about her specifically here before but since January 2022 she has been on my mind. Her name is Cheslie Kryst she was crowned miss USA in 2019. She was so beautiful and I remember thinking “oh my God” a black woman won the miss USA! Because at the time I think there was 5 black women crowned for pageants all over the world and they were all beautiful and smart. I was sooo proud ! I kept following cheslie online but then I deleted my Instagram so I stopped keeping up with her.
To my surprise on January 2022, I saw on the news that cheslie committed suicide! I was like what!? There is no way! This is obviously a murder investigation and someone probably pushed her off the balcony. I remember checking google for days to follow to make sure that she didn’t commit suicide and that someone as beautiful as her couldn’t possibly want to die to stop her suffering. But no she did actually jumped off that balcony and she died upon impact. She was sooo successful she was not only miss USA but she was a lawyer, a TV host and she did so many things to help the other women on the pageants. I just couldn’t believe that someone like her could possibly want to die! I was sad after that and I keep thinking about her. I still go on her Instagram, I saw her mom made an interview about her talking about how that day went. She sent her mom a text, posted a picture on Instagram with the caption “ I hope this day bring you rest and peace” and then she wrote a note stating that she is leaving all her assets to her mom, then she jumped off the balcony.
I remember thinking what if she changed her mind after she jumped!? What if she thought OMG what did I just do but then it was too late …
I still think about her to this day, and her story shook my world because you never know what someone may be going through. They may be rich, beautiful, successful, have a relationship that you envy but they could still be suffering and the only for them to stop the pain in their own perspective is to end their Iives. I am against suicide, i don’t think it is the right thing to do. But have I thought about it? yes, but then I remember how far I’ve come and how many hardships I overcame then I smile I thank God for being with me. Suicide is an end to a temporary problem; if you are struggling with mental health talk to someone you trust and please don’t be afraid. Go to therapy, pray to God, read the Bible, avoid people who make you feel bad about yourself but hang out with people who uplift you and make you see the good in yourself. I promise you this is just a bad chapter, eventually the page will turn and you will get to the good parts of your story.
We miss you cheslie :(
2023-12-01T23:00:55+01:00
2023-12-01T14:45:50+01:00
burn out
I am experiencing a burnout right now and I really think it's a result of me recovering from the flu I had last week but maybe it's been going on for a while now. I am really trying to keep things afloat, but I hate everything. I am exhausted, I don't want to talk to anyone, and I just want to be left alone. When people do leave me alone, I get sad because like why would you leave me alone when I clearly need help? lol but of course I am not asking for help either. I think the hardest thing I have to do in life is asking for help and also saying "goodbye" I do hate goodbyes which is why I always disappear before I have to say it first.
I don't have a problem with anyone, I just want to be alone right now even though that Is not what I need but that is what I want. I do need to be around people and that is why I love my job because I get along with my coworkers and we are always joking; I love it there. But besides work what do I have? I don't know... at my meetings I don't really hang out with many people there.
I don't know and that's the problem, I dissociate too much. I am there but really my mind is somewhere else and I have no idea what's going on; I am not even sure that I am real. ( I am going back to therapy. something is not right)
2023-12-01T12:32:09+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Update.
i feel sick. Emotionally I am drained. I am glad that I have my cats because they make me feel something when I am taking care of them. I am in a stage of burn-out..