Archives

2025-05-16T14:46:14+02:00

luteal phase

Publié par Gaelle.R 16 Mai 2025 à 02:46 PM

I always had a luteal phase but I didn't know about it until I started working out because I became frustrated when I realized how low my energy can be some days of the month. Then I started doing more research like why am I so tired? why do I feel like crying? why can't I lift as heavy today? blah blah and then boom Luteal phase pop up! I was like what the hell!!??? why? then I realize all my life I've had it and most of the time I thought I was relapsing into a depressive episode but nope it was just my cycle ruining everything for me!

I haven't been depressed in a very long time but I have been sad during my luteal phases but that sadness doesn't even last a week so it's not enough days to diagnose myself with depression because it has to be at least 2 weeks with low interest and feeling of hopelessness. During my luteal phase I will start working out early in the morning instead because I have a lot more energy in the morning than in the afternoon during that phase... in the afternoon I just want my bed and a snack.

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2025-05-15T20:49:54+02:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 15 Mai 2025 à 08:49 PM

some things I hate doing...

I hate blow drying or straightening my hair. I hate to put any type of heat in my hair because I don't want any heat damage. Although my hair looks strong and thick it gets damaged easily, I hate to put her through that much stress. the more heat I put on my hair the more hair I lose and the looser my curls look. I love my tight and thick curls. I probably won't blow-dry my hair ever again for a while. I hate it. I just return the blow-dryer I purchased last month. I don't want any of that stuff. Straightening may hair makes me feel like I am trying to be something that I am not! I am African descent and I have cute Afrocentric features that I love.
I hate calling people on the phone. I love my family and friends but I hate calling people on the phone, I would rather text.
I hate watching Anime or Kdrama... ugh I can't stand them they're so corny.

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2025-05-14T22:38:17+02:00

Diddy trial

Publié par Gaelle.R 14 Mai 2025 à 10:38 PM

I have been following the Diddy trial and reading the daily trial testimony transcript after each court session and my jaw is on the floor! some people are pure evil! I wish this trial was televised just like the Johnny Depp trial was but this is a federal trial which means FBI brought this case into effect so no cameras are allowed into the courtroom. This trial is way more disturbing than what Johnny Depp's defamation trial was. There's a lot of domestic abuse, human trafficking, freak offs I didn't know this term up until this trial... poor Cassie she must've heard things about Diddy because there's no way she walked into this blindfolded maybe she didn't know just how bad?

she testified on how Diddy would make her sleep with different men while Diddy would watch in the corner and some of these sessions lasted 4 days!!? they urinated on her and among other things I won't get into all of the details. One thing I learn about this trial is that often times the most beautiful women don't know their worth and they let the most random ugly man dictate how they should live their lives. She was so naïve and unaware of how beautiful she is! I literally had a picture of her as my wallpaper on my sony flip phone when I was a kid. she let that man decide everything and she became afraid of him when she was beginning to lose control... men can be evil, just like women too because the Johnny Depp trial showed just how bad women can be but Diddy is on another level. I will be following the case as much as I can because I really want to know what else was going on.

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2025-05-13T15:53:12+02:00

inner work part 2

Publié par Gaelle.R 13 Mai 2025 à 03:53 PM

Doing the inner work means focusing on your wellbeing and actively doing the work to change your bad habits, understanding your trauma, going to therapy, creating boundaries, taking a step back when needed, practicing self care, praying to God, journaling, doing research about your attachment style and love languages, knowing your triggers and work on getting them under control.

One of my triggers used to be when someone would ignore me I would actively try to get their attention back because I couldn't stand being ignored, in therapy I learned it was my people pleasing tendency that made me act like that. I have healed that part of myself but it took me some time, when I was little I used to do whatever it takes to make my mom love me because I thought love was supposed to be earn not given. I didn't believe anyone when they would tell me that they love me I used to believe that I had to earn that love. It took me a while to understand what loving someone truly means and that love is not earned at all ! when I understood this and when I saw how much I love my mother and some people who did nothing for me I begin to accept that I didn't have to go above and beyond to make someone love me. Now when someone ignore me or disrespect me I don't take it personal, if I did nothing wrong then I know that their reaction is a response to their own internal battles and that has nothing to do with me. I simply take my attention back and focus on myself and on people who love me. I have nothing to prove to anyone, people will say whatever they want and there's nothing I can do to change their beliefs if they don't want to see me for who I am. You can't argue with someone who can't see reason, you can't chase someone who wants nothing to do with you because the more you cling to them the more they will run away.

Back in 2019 I was broken, after my beloved brother's death on 12/2018 I was completely lost I cried for 6 months straight maybe more. I used to listen to TD jakes, Sarah jakes or any speaker that I thought was speaking life into me. Listening to motivational speakers is not enough you need to do the actual work, you need to actually make more friends, take a walk outside, move your body, find a job, find a purpose, write down what you want, let go of bad habits and replace them with good habits because when you get rid of your bad habits but you don't replace them with something good then new or old bad habits will creep in again. Going to therapy helped me but simply talking about my issues is not enough! I needed to listen to what God was trying to tell me which was " draw close to me and I will draw closer to you" (…) I needed to do the work not simply talk about my problems! I have come really far. The person I was 4-5 years ago is gone, some people will have to meet me again because I am not broken anymore because I've done a ton of inner work. I am not perfect at times my old habits or old ways want to come back but I remind myself that I am not that person anymore. Prayer is a very powerful tool, I don't tell anyone my problems anymore because 9/10 times people dont care or they're happy that they're not going through what you're going through. Stop telling people about your struggles when you haven't found a solution, pray to God instead and talk to someone you trust (don't talk to everyone because outside noises will stray you from the path you need to take)

If you have time to worry about what other people are doing, to cry about the past then you're not busy enough. Rearrange your schedule and add goals for yourself to complete a day. For example: aim to read 10 pages in a book, take at least 5,000 steps a day, work out or take a walk for at least 30minutes, call your family, drink 64 ounce of water depending on your body weight, read 1 chapter in the bible and meditate, journal, sleep 8-7 hours a day...there's so much you can do with your time instead of thinking about the past. You should be exhausted from doing all this that by the end of the day you're ready for bed. If you have time to look for things that aren't serving you then you're not busy enough. As Ephesians 5: 15,16 says " keep strict watch that how you walk is not as unwise but as a wise person, 16 Making the best use of your time, because the days are wicked". Stop spending hours on the phone gossiping, worrying about others, thinking of sad memories... but instead fill your day with positive things. Always remmeber "what you're not changing you're choosing."

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2025-05-13T15:39:27+02:00

Inner work

Publié par Gaelle.R 13 Mai 2025 à 03:39 PM

As much as I hate to admit but people on podcast who talks about doing the inner work, to focus on yourself and giving you advise on how take your power back; at times those people are right!

when you focus on what other people are doing and you hang out with people who drain your energy that's not caring about your wellbeing. Those people on podcast who talk about how it's okay to be selfish, to work on yourself, to stop chasing people, to have boundaries and to have self respect can sometimes take it to far... I don't agree with some of their teaching especially the "power of manifestation" I believe if you are manifesting something you are actively asking the universe for something and there are bad spirit in the world of the unknown if you need something just simply ask God. DO NOT LOOK FOR SPELL to make someone love you or to get what you want that's black magic and that's against God's teaching (I never try any of that because I believe there are consequences for anything that you do it will come back 10 folds). There is a fine line between believing you can get whatever you and I will do whatever it takes to get whatever I want. If you need to actively chase something that seems to be unattainable, it could be a person or a job then maybe God is telling you "no" or "not now", just simply let it go and what is meant for you will find you. Do not force anything, let it flow.

*read next article about doing the inner work.

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2025-05-12T02:37:06+02:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 12 Mai 2025 à 02:37 AM

If you have to prove to someone why you’re the right person then you’re not, just simply let them lose you. You have nothing to prove! You’re exactly who you’re supposed to be, you don’t have to change to be right for anyone. So many people are in relationships where they can’t even be themselves, why suffer like this? As a girl if you have to chase a man respectfully just say eww and move on. When a man is acting like he’s too good for me I roll my eyes and find someone way hotter lol. What you’re not going to make me do is chase you. Eww.

I used to chase. I used to tell a man “ I have feelings for you” and “ we should go out” but I’m done. It never worked, when I go to a wedding I never heard the groom says she chased me down and look at us now nah he always says “ I had to try hard to get her, I had to keep chasing her to get this beautiful girl to marry me” men love the chase they don’t like anything easy. If you’re easy he will sleep with you and marry his dream girl.

Men are simple, it was never about how hard you try to get him, all you have to do is exist and he will come to you if he finds you attractive and the more he talks to you then a relationship will build. Now I can’t tell you how to successful get a man because I never have lol … the rest is on you babe.

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2025-05-12T00:31:01+02:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 12 Mai 2025 à 12:31 AM

Boundaries

In a world where everything is accessible to us at just a single click away you need to have your own boundaries to keep your sanity.

One big problem most of us have including myself is phone addiction. When you have to check your phone the minute you wake up you should know that is not normal! 30 years ago people didn’t have smartphones how did you think they live their lives? They made plans to see each other in person, not on FaceTime or texting each other all day without any clear plans or useless phone calls. People had stronger connections back in the day because they met each other in person. You can’t have a strong relationship solely based online, eventually you have to meet the person to see if there’s any true compatibility. When you spend hours scrolling on social media you open up your mind to anything whether good or bad. When you don’t have any clear intentions when you are using an app you give the app the power to choose any content for you, most of the time the content we watch poison our minds and confuse ourselves. For example not too long ago I was watching this girl talk about how she slept with 100 men in one day just to be the first woman who slept with the most men in 24 hours! That video was so upsetting to me! I was appalled but I kept watching even though I didn’t agree with any of the things she was saying… at the end of the video I felt bad for her! That emotion came from watching her speak but I didn’t have to feel bad for her because she claimed to be happy that she beat that record! Why should I even care? What we watch on social media can make us accept a lot of things that we wouldn’t have before. For example the lgbt or gay movement, transgender movement, 2 men adopting a baby now most people are accepting of these things and if you don’t they will tell you well get with the program this is what’s trending! Just because everyone is talking about it doesn’t mean you have to agree with it! Just because everyone is doing something doesn’t mean you have to do it too.

I haven’t had notifications on my phone for 4 years now, there’s certain times during the day or at night if you call me you would have to call twice otherwise you simply won’t reach me. I don’t get any text notifications on any app, I have to physically open the app to see what’s going on. I feel less and less anxious not being connected with everyone at all times. If I am friends with you on social media but we’re strangers in real life I won’t watch your story or see any of your post ( I mute everyone I don’t know) I choose to see what I want to see on instagram which is mostly fitness influencers and their workouts or cats lol I am not keeping tabs on anyone. I don’t want to know what so and so is doing that’s where I would start comparing myself to them and I don’t want that. I am happy with where I am in life and I love my journey I don’t need to see what other people are doing.

To combat my phone addiction I started setting a time limit on every social media app some of them are 4 hours a day, 2 hours and when I reach that time I don’t open that app anymore. I have to put my phone down and to either work out, take a walk outside, journal or read a book. The very same people who created smartphones and robot barely use them! They create them, make money and log off ! They are aware of the cons of being addicted to technology. But we can’t even spend 4 minutes without checking our phones! That is sad! When you scroll on social media before bedtime you are more prone to have insomnia, depression, loneliness and lack of motivation. Put that phone away! Some of us would be happier if we simply put the phone down and connect with people in real life. I just started doing that when I’m out with my friends, at a party, at a restaurant my phone is in my purse; I live in the moment. I am happier now because I have a ton of boundaries and I don’t feel bad about enforcing them. For example when I am ovulating I don’t listen to any music that talks about sex because my body crave it at that time and during my luteal phase I don’t listen to any sad music. I have a period tracker app to know when all of those changes are happening to follow my plan. Your brain will believe whatever you tell it to or whatever you keep on doing. If you want to be sad just listen to sad music, think about the past and your brain will trigger you to be sad. If you want to be happy just think about the future and all the exciting things you want to do, listen to happy music and exercise then boom suddenly you’re happy! It’s not rocket science your brain is sort of like a muscle you have to train it to get what you want.

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2025-05-10T11:59:53+02:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 10 Mai 2025 à 11:59 AM

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2025-05-09T20:23:09+02:00

Q&A

Publié par Gaelle.R 9 Mai 2025 à 08:23 PM

what's your favorite fruit?

water melon.

do you have any pet peeves?

I have a lot! among them are : slow drivers, people who chew with their mouths open, men who uses acronyms instead of forming a clear sentence (girls tend to spell their words out) if you're a grown man don't send me "wyd, hy" I will block you, people who sits on their phones and not exercising on a machine that I need to use at the gym, people who touch me without my consent.

what's your favorite exercise?

RDLS :)))))

what's your least favorite exercise?

back lunges but they hurt so good.

Do you like sneakers or heels?

uhm both but if I can wear heels I will pick heels because it makes me look taller and I feel powerful in them.

what show you find overrated?

Friends. I just don't really find that show funny at all. but one show I wish I could watch is game of thrones only because of Khaleesi the mother of dragons! her edits are fire on tiktok she's soooo powerful but I heard she died at the end... I didn't watch the show and I am disappointed. I can't watch that show there's too much incest, explicit scenes and other things my conscience won't let slide...

Is there something in life you wish you could do?

I wish I could just wake up and not have to do my hair and for it to look perfect all the time. For my hair to be halfway decent I need to sleep with a bonnet on to minimize the frizz and to protect my curls from drying up on my pillow. I have to spray my curls with a curl refresher, or apply some hair products to make it look presentable... let me not get started on wash day and twisting methods...I love my hair but it needs work to look pretty I can't just wake up and go.

what's something you want to try?

Pilates! every time I schedule a class I end up just going to my gym to lift weights instead lol

what do you like to do in the summer?

walk on the beach to watch the sunset :)))))

why do you like extroverts?

they bring out the fun side out of me, they make me laugh, they're so lively and free.. They talk a lot and I love to talk... so all of that makes my life better. They get me out of my comfort zone, force me to try new things. I have to marry an extrovert otherwise I'll be miserable.

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2025-05-09T16:56:06+02:00

Things I love about me :)

Publié par Gaelle.R 9 Mai 2025 à 04:56 PM

For self love purpose let's all create a list of things we like about ourselves and make it good ! (don't be modest)

here's mine.

My ability to adapt to any environment. At first I will complain that I hate change but as soon as I am in that environment it's like I've been there for years lol. I have the ability to blend yet still stand out but not in a bad way. Some people know me and I don't even know who they are (that's the power of my presence)
my ability to move on from anything. At first I will overreact because I am very dramatic but after I am done which usually last less than 1 day I will act like nothing happen and no it's not an act I did actually move on. Maybe it's my abandonment issues ( I need more therapy for that but bare with me), my past traumas but I expect the worse from people and when they disappoint me It doesn't surprise me anymore... which makes it easier for me to just move on and go one with my life.
my positive outtake on life. I am very positive now and it wasn't always like that, back in 2021-2022 when I went through the worse depressive episode of my life I was super negative (I actually wanted to die but Jehovah my God was there and every time I cried it felt like he was holding me) I am soo positive now and I think it's because I work out a lot and that releases a lot of happy hormones in my brain which helps tremendously.
my kindness. Often people doesn't want to believe how kind I am! I am an empath I understand people's emotion so believe me I know when I hurt someone and it hurts me more knowing that I caused it. I try to keep things light because the more I overthink the more likely I will have a depressive episode (I haven't had one in 2 years!) I am really nice, I look out for other people, at times I will put others needs before my own but now I am learning not to do that because a lot of people took my kindness for granted.
my ability not to care but only the people who gets on my last nerves. when I am dealing with a narcissist I know! I have done a lot of inner work, read a ton about narcissistic behaviors that I chose to ignore those people and not care about them.
how unique I am. I am very comfortable with who I am and I wouldn't change for anything. There are good and bad things about me but the good outweighs the bad. Plus I am funny at times so that makes it more fun :)

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