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2022-12-16T18:55:40+01:00
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2022-12-15T21:56:49+01:00
purchase this book and let the words resonate with you! you won't regret
the mountain is you
"When we are in denial, we tend to go into “blame” mode. We look for anyone or anything to explain why we are the way we are. Then we start justifying. If you have to constantly—on a near daily basis—rationalize why you’re unhappy about your life, you are not doing yourself any favors. You are not getting any closer to creating the lasting change that you so deeply desire" by Brianna Weist
The first step in healing anything is taking full accountability. It is no longer being in denial about the honest truth of your life and yourself. It does not matter what your life looks like on the outside; it is how you feel about it on the inside. It is not okay to be constantly stressed, panicked, and unhappy. Something is wrong, and the longer you try to “love yourself ” out of realizing this, the longer you are going to suffer.
2022-12-15T21:39:13+01:00
the mountain is you by Brianna Weist !! this book is speaking to me
"The mountain that stands in front of you is the calling of your life, your purpose for being here,
and your path finally made clear.
One day, this mountain will be behind you,
but who you become in the process of getting over it will stay with you always.
In the end, it is not the mountain that you must master, but yourself."
"We are programmed to seek what we’ve known. Even though we think we’re after happiness, we’re actually trying to find whatever we’re most used to."
2022-12-15T21:33:15+01:00
book to read...
just started
The mountain is you by Brianna wiest
2022-12-15T21:16:21+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
I feel so cringed reading things that I posted on here in 2014 gosh...please don't go read them but I just want to leave them here just to prove to myself that I got better. My writing is more readable now and much more organized than it has ever been but one thing I keep forgetting is that I was a new english learner in high school back then; there's no doubt that my writing wouldn't have been perfect....but still I feel so cringed.
2022-12-15T17:35:43+01:00
truth
- I find that I am happier when I limit my social media usage and when I don't go on instagram. For me it is not so much about the amount of time that I spent on there because I am very adamant about leaving an app if I feel like I am scrolling anxiously. But let me be completely transparent with you seeing people my age getting married, being engaged, buying a house or whatever milestone that they make in their lives, make me a little more self aware about the things that I have not done yet. I am not jealous nor bitter but I do feel a little behind seeing people my age doing things that I want to do or experienced. quite frankly I am happy for them but with my mental health being all shaky and not in a great place I now chose to not go on instagram as much or at all until I feel like I am up for it.
- I turn off my phone. I have been turning off my phone more often and it's not because I am trying to avoid anyone; I just feel like my anxiety has been at an all time high lately when it comes to notifications coming from my phone. I am always anxious when my phone rings so I chose to shut it off for my own good. By doing that I have been feeling a lot better.
2022-12-15T15:49:03+01:00
another one :(
Yesterday I came across a terrible news while I was doing my weekly trip on twitter. I was so shocked to learn that Dj Stephen with the nickname Twitch from the Ellen show has died at 40 years old by suicide. I truly believe that more of us are struggling in silence while pretending that we are happy and that we have it all together; it's nothing to be ashamed of to admit that you don't have it all together and that you are in fact miserable. This shows that men also struggle with mental health and loneliness, and it's even less likely that they will talk about it because men are brought up to be strong and to be the head of an household, but anyone can struggle mentally. It's time that we encourage our male figures in our lives to speak about their feelings and to discuss where they are mentally; let's keep the conversation open and let's be an emotional support for one another. If you are my friend just know that you can always come to me about your struggles please never make a decision that you cannot change, even if we're not friends we can still talk. I am not a mental health provider but I am an advocate, I know what it feels like to hit rock bottom. To be honest, you would be shocked to find out about how many of us are actually faking so let's opened up that conversion let's admit how we really feel before we do something that we can't change.
Being suicidal is nothing to be ashamed of it shows that some things aren't going great in your life and that you need help mentally. Before you commit the act let's try talking to someone you love and trust; let's go to therapy and sometimes being suicidal is not our fault there could be some hormonal imbalance in the brain that causes you to be sad and want to take your own life so let's seek a pshycriatic and see what medication is available to balanced those hormones and get those endorphins flowing in the brain.
I have been very miserable and at times I do want to disappear but not in a way to take my own life. Going to therapy has helped me to regain control over my depression and those dark thoughts that often cloud my mind. Writing poetry about how I feel has helped and by the simple fact that I know a ton of us are going through the same issues and emotional heartache that I am going through make me feel like I am not alone in this. I read about people who went through similar problems as me and try to see what they did to get out of that funk. It's never easy to admit that you're really sad or that you don't have the will to live anymore... you might be scared that people might judge you but the only person who will judge you for being miserable are assholes and jerks so cut them all off (sorry for saying a bad word but those people had it coming) grab a scissors and cut them off. the right people will pull you in a hug and tell you that they're there for you whenever you need help (hold those people close to you they are angels)
Please dial or text 988 if you or you know someone who is struggling with suicidal thoughts.
2022-12-14T17:58:30+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Toxic Relationship.
part 2
I can't begin to comprehend why would someone be attracted
to someone that causes them so much pain and heartbreak. It's like a lot of people are getting even more attracted to pain.
For example, some people hate being in a relationship with someone who expresses their love freely,
who does all the right things because they would rather be with someone who makes them fight to be noticed or to even receive a little bit of love they would have to beg for it?
Why is this generation so keen on being in love with the wrong person?
why is pain becoming acceptable? why is it that we fall in love deeper with someone who doesn't even pay us any attention?
actually, I am taking myself out of that equation because I am not attracted to that. I feel it when someone doesn't love me and all I want to do is run away from this hostile environment.
I want to be loved and treated with utmost care because I know I can give those things so freely to the person I love the most.
My theory is that more and more of us are growing up in households that don't show us what genuine love is supposed to look like,
we think that we have to fight to get love from someone which is wrong!
You don't have to fight for someone's love who genuinely loves you.
I love this verse in the bible that says that love is not pain. love is not jealous, it doesn't take account of the bad things
All of that idea that you have to chase a man down for him to love you will only leave you heartbroken and drained.
As A woman there's nothing that will make me chase a man, I am the prize and I believe in my worth. I don't have to beg or chase any man,
I think more women should be focusing more on themselves than on relationships with a man. I assure you
by focusing on yourself and by loving yourself you will know when you are being mistreated and you will have the strength in you to walk away because you know that you deserve better.
A relationship should never define you; sure at times I feel like I want to find love and date someone but I'll be fine if it doesn't happen.
perhaps being in a relationship is not in store for me right now but there are many other things that I can do like:
I have many places that I want to travel to, and while I am alone I can save up enough money to start traveling.
I can learn a new language and I've already started I am currently learning Italian.
I can write the novel I've always wanted to write, I already started.
I can throw myself into serving God and having a deeper relationship with him, I've already started doing that.
I could learn a new instrument; I want to learn how to play piano and guitar :)
I could get more friends.
I could read more books and learn about historical figures because I love all of that stuff.
I could collect more meaningful art. Because I love art.
There are so many things that I can do without a man and still be happy and fulfilled that I don't feel defined by any man whatsoever.
I am never too attached to anyone, the same way that I came in I can head out just as quick if not faster.
My wellbeing will always be my priority because I am my greatest possession.
2022-12-14T15:27:01+01:00
really sad news.
I missed the stromae concert :( I was really looking forward to it and the day came but I just didn't want to go alone !! so I stayed home and cried because I don't like going to big crowds alone... I had no one I could ask to go with me. If I had a fun friend I would've asked them to go with me, I would even pay for their ticket but sadly I didn't see anyone that I could ask. If he comes to my town again I will not miss it again because I was really looking forward to it since last year and I just didn't go because I was chickened out by going alone.
2022-12-14T15:17:01+01:00
friends?
Is it me or is it becoming harder to make friends in your 20's? especially in your mid-20's because almost everyone have already made their close friends in college or in high school. Here I am without a close friend looking for one and it is hard! I met my last best friend in college and we were really close; we moved in together for like 3 years and it was really great, we did everything together and I loved her like my sister but somehow we grew apart... and I always wished that we didn't. I don't know if I'll ever have another friend like her and sometimes I would think of something she did or said and I would smile...
I need a close friend because in order for me to be a social butterfly I need a companion. In order for my extroverted nature to come out I need a close friend near me and after that everything is possible. I need a friend to hit the town with, go out to parties, go shopping again at the mall because I would rather shop online than to go to the mall alone!, I want someone I can go to parties with, dance with and act crazy with because I am so bored with life right now.