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2025-12-15T01:22:16+01:00
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2025-12-14T18:06:37+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
I had a weird dream last night! I remember most of my dreams but this one felt so real that when I woke up I felt chill going down my spine!
Anyway the dream goes: I am walking and suddenly a car pulled next to me and about 3-4 officers come out, they’re dressed in immigration uniform like the USCIS badge on them. All I remember after that is me yelling “I’m a US citizen” but they don’t even listen to me at all! They grabbed me shoved me in the car. Next thing I know I’m inside a bin and they are wheeling me into a warehouse. I can see through a peephole and I see Asian children running around me while I’m inside the bin. I hear people talking they’re saying “ what do we do with her?” then I woke up! What scared me the most is that after I woke up I went on instagram and I keep seeing people filming immigration officers harassing them! Like how scary is that? And before that was I’ve never see any of that on my feed, at first I thought maybe I saw something like that and that’s why I dreamed about it but nope. I remember being so scared in my dream and I felt like no one was listening to me. No one cared that I am actually here legally.
I don’t know what that dream is trying to tell me, but I definitely don’t trust immigration officers at all. I heard some people are dressed as officers and they’re kidnapping people. Anyway let me not think about this too much and just try to enjoy my Sunday.
2025-12-13T21:12:22+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
I will share my opinion on this topic and some people might find it weird that I am talking about it now but I just recently thought about it.
During Covid or at the height of Covid we were forced to take the Covid vaccine and I think that was unethical and dangerous! Taking vaccines should be a personal choice and I’m saying this as someone who gives vaccines and who believes in the effectiveness of most vaccine but the Covid vaccines should have been optional. People lost their jobs because they did not take the vaccine, what if I was allergic to the content of the vaccine? What if the vaccine caused me to die!? What are the sides effects? no I mean besides the sore arm, headache or fever what will happen in 10 years? Then have the nerve to have boosters!? I think all vaccines should be optional. It really should be a personal choice, I do take the flu vaccine every year and I am always forced to take it by my job but why? Yes I get the vaccine is suppose to help lessen the symptoms of the flu but I can still get the flu tho! I’m saying this as someone who took the flu vaccine at the end of last year and still got the flu in the beginning of this year… I felt so sick it’s even worse than Covid. No I won’t pass on the chance to take the flu vaccine because the flu is dangerous. But that should be my choice why do I feel forced to take it by my job!?
2025-12-13T19:44:16+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Saturdays are becoming my favorite days now. I normally sleep early Friday nights because my body is normally really sore from working out the whole week, like last night for example my back was soooo sore I couldn’t even lay on my back! I love back days because I love a nice muscular back especially in men omg, but on women omg it’s just sooo beautiful. One of my fitness goals is to have a nice muscular back, I am almost there! Anyways I slept for 10 hours last night. I woke up around 6am to get ready for the gym and started my workout at 7am it was a nice workout, I destroyed my legs and glutes! I loved every minute of it!
And no my back is no longer sore because I slept.
2025-12-12T16:50:27+01:00
what I do to calm myself down
To calm myself down I do quite a few things and it varies depending on if I am in public or not:
- If I am getting a panic attack in public which rarely happens now unless I am alone in a huge crowd or I am out and I don't like my outfit. Sometimes I get anxious for absolutely no reason which happens quite often I would play with my ring, count to 10 in my head, breathe in and out 5 times (concentrate on each breath and it gets easier as I keep breathing).
- If I am home and I get anxious, sad or angry I will close my eyes and picture myself at the beach, I would play wave sound in the background to really take me there. I love the beach especially the wave (in the summer I would go to the beach to nap lol), trees, nature, birds sounds, lakes, mountains...all of those things makes me happy and calm me down.
- In my house there's always rain sound coming from My Alexa so yeah it is always raining at my house. that sound makes me feel peaceful and at ease.
- I also color with crayons in a coloring book yes It's for kids but that helps me calm down.
2025-12-12T14:36:19+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Hey you guys a little mini update.
I am turning 29 years old on December 24th wow can you believe it? I started this blog when I was 15 years old! it was my greatest possession at that time. I was a teenager in high school and I was soo lost! I was learning English for the very first time. I am so glad to take all of you on my journey. We basically grew up together and now we about to hit a huge milestones next year when I turn 30 years old! wow this does not feel real at all.
Because it's December I can drink wine and I have been for the past 2 weeks. I normally have 1/2 or not even glass of red wine with my dinner. It does feel weird lol because I don't normally drink and some days I skip the wine because I feel a little woozy lol...before I used to drink a whole bottle now I can't even drink 1/2 a glass lol but you know what I love that for me because I don't like drinking alcohol alone at home or even at parties. I like being sober way more than being tipsy.
I have been feeling low lately, not like sad but low energy. Normally when I feel this way I look what I ate the day before, what I drank, am I scrolling on social media for hours? well right now I need a detox. I need to stop eating some foods, stop talking to some people, stop engaging in reckless activities well not that many but there are some.
2025-12-11T19:32:33+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Honestly I don't think I can date a man who doesn't work out, even though I still reject guys while I remain happily single (I am already looking into adoption process because I don't think I will find that man to get married and pregnant by, I desperately want a kid) but aside from all of that if he doesn't work out he won't understand me at all!
How do I tell him yes I did go to the gym to lift weights in the morning but now in the afternoon I am going outside for a run even though it is 25 degrees out! and yes I spend 2 hours at the gym and no I didn't go anywhere else besides the grocery store lol and yes I have to sleep 8 hours a night and yes I am in bed by 7:30pm and the times I stayed up talking to him on the phone past 8:30 pm was me sacrificing my sleep for him. How do I tell him at times I go to sleep at 7:30pm so I can get 9 hours of sleep a night...he will think I am crazy when I tell him I need to consume 140-150 grams of protein a day so I need to eat 3-4 times a day lol (I don't drink soda, fast foods, juice, ice cream, pizza) oh he gonna lose it when I tell him I wake up at 4:24 am daily even on the week ends lol but on those days I do go back to sleep
2025-12-11T16:10:18+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
things I've heard about myself
- I have an intense stare
- I have a dry humor
- I am quiet or I am loud surprisingly
- I am nice
- I look like way younger than my actual age (oh ok)
- I am reserved
- that I have a cold stare lol
- that I am not as welcoming (I mean depending on my mood that day)
- that I do what I want (ok yes)
- that I like being alone(true)
- that I isolate myself too much (Ok not true!)
- That I am introverted (true)
- that I look mean (how I look mean but I'm nice?)
- that I am always in a hurry (true)
2025-12-08T18:50:29+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
If I was a man I would only date women who goes to the gym! I love looking at them they work so hard for their body and they motivate me. They're disciplined, patient, hard working, dedicated and overall beautiful. They only get finer and finer! you saw them 6 months ago and 6 months later they look even better! ugh we're in a whole another league.
2025-12-06T19:38:51+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
In dating
I have a no bullshit mentally, I tell you what I like and what I don’t like, when you know and you chose to do something completely different that’s when we’re done. I won’t make a scene or create a toxic environment just because I am not getting what I need, I’ll simply leave. Why do I have to beg a man to act right when another man can give me what I want without me asking?
I always advise my friends to chose the man and not give the man the power to chose whether he wants you or not. No babe you’re the prize! Stop worshiping these men and put the focus back on yourself. One thing I always remember “ the egg doesn’t swim to the sperm! The sperm swim to the egg” never chase a man, let him do what he wants and you decide whether you want to stay or not. If you’re not going to leave then stop complaining! You’ve made your bed so now you have to lay in it.
One thing for sure it takes a lot to keep me interested. I am always busy and one thing to really know if I like you or not, is when I give you my time and I let you into my world. Meaning I invite you to my place, let you be around my cats, let you in my car, let you work out with me… those places are my most intimate and private places I don’t let just anyone in there. I am a slow burner and I never move fast when it comes to love. I never give anyone I don’t like my time, I can’t entertain anything I don’t feel in my heart excites me. I follow my head more than my emotions. I’m the type of person who would confess my love today and gone tomorrow. I never stay where I don’t feel welcomed or comfortable. I don’t force anyone to love me or be with me, I am more comfortable alone! Opening myself up to someone is torture and he would have to be worth the heartache that may come with it. I am an avoidant I don’t really need much … but from the person I love I may need a little more.