Nowadays it is hard to find love and for a nice girl to be taken seriously she would have to give up something. And so she thought. We are blinded by the fact that someone can actually find the love that he or she deserves. Throughout my life i am sad to say that i have not met a boy who is willing to love a girl without getting anything in return. These boys will do anything to prove to their friends how based on their term “they got the juice” and us girls we are supposed to play along by giving in. If we decide to hold back by not engaging in anything that would break what we value the most then we are called “stuck up” and the girl who cannot have fun. So many girls have gone down the road of no return by leading a life like the boys. We try to have many relationship at a time saying that we do not care and we can act like the boys but at the end of the day we are found curled up on our beds crying. We were not made to be like the boys. They can say to a girl that they love her just to gain something but us girls we can try but we will regret it someday. We have so much to lose. I met some nice girls who turned out to be different after their first relationship and who’s fault is that? You can say that it is our fault for being so gullible and for giving them what they want. In 2016 a new term came out “the fuckboys” the type of guy who will promise you anything to have sex with you. They will talk about what they’ve done to that girl and laugh it off with their friends who in the end call her a slut. Not knowing she was intentionally giving away a part of her to a guy no a boy who she thought she loved. All i see these days are boys, i do not see any men who deserve a nice girl. There might still be nice guys but some girls have ruin it for some. When you were born, you were so innocent and you did not know how much the real world hurts and how much pain you will have to go through before you learn. Which brings me to those girls they are calling a “hoe” these terms are a disgrace to our next generation. What do you tell a 10 years old girl when she ask what does a hoe mean? But that is what it all comes down to. Do you tell her it is someone who have sex with a lot of people? No one was born with the intention of hurting other people or of taking advantage of others. Sadly but true our upbringing can shape who we will become. For those girls who will give up their body to feel loved they were not born this way. They want to feel loved and somehow they were thought that to feel loved there is a price to pay and so they keep it in mind. Now their body is their price. Perhaps they have a nice family, big house, enormous family but do they feel love do you know how lonely she feels at times? But she does not know that love does not have a price. She is willing to do the most repellent thing to make herself loved. That boy she is with is just taking advantage of her asking her for more and in the end he end up leaving her on the sidewalk in the cold. She just wanted to be loved and she thought it was special with him. Now she is broken asking what did she do to deserve this...in my opinion she done nothing and that is the problem. I admit not everyone is strong enough to stay alone waiting for the right one at the right time when everyone else seems happy and having “the perfect relationship” but all she had to was loving herself enough to know that she does not have to settle for less than she deserves. In the beginning of the relationship with that former boy somewhere inside she might have known how foolish she would have to be to get what she wants but she went for it anyway. Sometimes she even think that he will change and that there is something good in him that he does not know about. When you see her crying and you knew from the beginning what was going to happen and somehow manage to tell her the outcomes but of course she did not listen to you. What do you do ? do you tell her i told you so? Before you answer think about what you would have done if you were in her shoes. Would you have told her she is stupid for playing along or would you be compassionate. I do not have many friends and i am not ashamed to say that i am happier that way but let say if one of my 2 to 3 friends had something like that happened to them...here’s what i would do. Before i talk to her i would offer her my shoulder to cry on and i would softly stroke her hair because trust me there is nothing more comforting than to hold a girl while she is crying(it makes her feel safe) I would have to mean it because that will only ruin the moment. I will tell her to stop crying and that she just learn something about life. I'll say You cannot trust everyone little girl ! which will make her laugh because i am the little one between my friends...no time to joke. I would tell her he did not deserve her if he was not able to see what i see then he is blind. I will tell her how amazing she is i would give her an example to back me up. I will tell her that one day she will find the right one who will stay by her side and will hold her like i am holding her at the moment. But she needs to take some time off of the dating market. She needs to date herself now by learning about herself, accepting herself and by living life as it is without waiting for anything from anyone. She needs to learn how to be alone and to see for herself the positive things about herself. If she cannot see how wonderful she is no one else will make her believe it. She needs to love herself before she allows anyone else to love her. Many girls actually believe that no guy will love them if they do not try to get close to them by having sex forgetting that sex is not the closest feeling there is in a relationship it can also breaks them apart. Some will agree that sex is the best thing they have with their significant other. What about quality time? Does it always have to mean undressing the other to have a good time? Why can we just talk no boy ever says that. If you are a girl and you hear that from a “boy” then he is not a boy because honey you have found yourself a man. If he does not require sex as the only thing fun in the relationship then he loves you. Guys i know these days will not waste time to hit it as soon as possible which makes them fuckboys. It is a very popular term this year and sadly it applies to a lot of boys in high school, college. Now you may be wondering where will i find the right one? Well actually it is nowhere because the right one finds you and you do not have to look for them because they are right there in front of you. It is not easy to be a girl and on top of it to have a strong opinion about your beliefs. Girls are not been taking seriously for most we are just a piece of ass and pair of boobs. No one really care that we may have an opinion when we have a pretty face or blond. May i remind you that blonds are not necessarily dumb ! and all black girls who have a big butt is not necessarily a stripper or a hoe. You do not really know someone unless you have long conversations with them to figure out where they might fit in this wagon we call society. Sometimes you might think you know someone but in the end they turned out to be a complete different person than who they appeared to be.
From a girl speaking her mind.