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some articles are posted later because of final edits... sorry for the wait LOL actuall i ain't sorry LOL.
2016-11-07T22:03:54+01:00
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2016-11-07T21:54:31+01:00
self confidence.
Hello it's been a while...i have been busy but y'all know that i have to be back here. So i think the tittle kind of give it away but i want you to actually read this and think about yourself. I know people are saying love yourself, be yourself, believe in yourself...i mean they are right but it's easier to say then done. Honestly i have tried all of these in the past and i can tell you straight up it didn't mean anything. You have to actually accept who you are. You wanna believe that you're rich but the reality is you broke so embrace that, you wanna believe that you got a relationship when in reality you're just lonely as hell well then accept the fact that you don't have anyone. LOL i have to get this out. Some people have illusions in their heads saying they are all that but truth is they are not and when they realize that they kinda feel sad. Let me tell you this if you already know your flaws and you point them out already no one can hurt you with it because it is not new to you nor anyone. when they say believe in yourself ...what i am supposed to believe? who am i? i have to actually find out who i am to know what i am believing in right? I can chose to believe in the person i want myself to be but that doesn't mean i am that girl. Same to you you can't actually believe in yourself unless you know who you actually are. Now don't go ahead and fool yourself thinking you just have to believe you are this amazing shining star to become that star because there is a possibility that you may not be that star if you don't work hard enough. I am suppose to motivate you and now you're probably thinking she is telling me that i can't become someone great NOOOO that is not what i am saying. I am not talking about your future goals keep doing what you're doing in school, work. I am talking about those lies you are telling yourself. If all your friends say you can't sing don't dream about becoming a pop star, if you can't take a good picture and you know it then don't waste your time telling yourself you will become a photographer because you won't. I love you all and i like that some of you keep checking on me once in a while but please do not lie to yourself it will only hold you back from becoming who you are ought to become. Believing in yourself first of all figure out who you are. Be who you are first of all find out what you like and what you don't like then do what you like that's being yourself. Just do what you want to do is being yourself. Love yourself is pretty accurate but some people let other people love them instead of loving themselves which is totally wrong You have to actually love yourself first. Inbox me for any questions...
have a nice day.
2016-11-01T03:22:07+01:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
you may see someone but don't really know who they are.
you may think that you're the only one going through what you are going through right now. But you are not.
You may think that you are in love but you might just be dreaming of a dream that was once were...
you may think that you are normal but to my eyes you will never be... and you should feel special
you may think that your heart is broken, but all the pieces might be laying down right in front of you.
you may think that summer was the best part of the year but wait until spring
you may feel sad but who am i to tell you that you will never be happy again.
You may think that you won't find love again when your soulmate might be right next to you.
You may want to give up but i'll tell you that it is a very dangerous game
you may think that your life is a secret; but is it really? when someone else might discover the truth...
you may think that i am writing this and i can't make it rhyme but i'll tell you i do what i want.
you may think that i follow the rules all the time but you won't believe what i did yesterday.
you may think that i am trouble but you just saw half of what i am capable of.
You may think that i'll be alright after everything but i am great.
2016-10-28T04:14:11+02:00
chockers
Hi there! I have something on my mind that i just found out how some people mostly men think when females wear certain stuff. Some men just don't care about what a women wear and they don't try to put any meaning to it. Some men in the other hand look for everything in a women that can be seen as sexual. Before i start saying what i just found out i have to tell you that chokers are sort of trendy right now and i am not wearing it for that particular reason, i just like chokers despite what people *cough men might think about me when i wear it. I just think chokers are easy to wear and looks really nice that's all i was thinking when i bought it and i have been wearing it for a month now. I had nothing in mind like it was a purely innocent desire. But some guys at my work were making fun of it although they joke around with me a lot i don't mind i do that too so it's kinda fun and mutual. Since the day i first wore it they started talking about it LOL i was like whatever... so this morning i googled the meaning because that's what google is for. UH...pause i found a website mamamia literally ! i was shocked. Let's just say the content was rather sexual and i am not going to talk about it here because i can't put a restriction on this blog for 18+ so i am not going to make it PG 13 but i am disgusted by how men think. Like i am not going to stop wearing my choker just because it's like a collar degrading my personal life. I am not going to stop because i like it and it was my money that bought i am going to stop wearing it when i am bored with it or when i want to stop wearing it that's it. I was saying before some day you will have to make an important decision in your life so start now by choosing who you are and where you stand. I know who i might be which is why i am not following the crowd and letting other people make decisions for me. I am doing what i know and i can only do that. I cannot be who i am not and i cannot do what i don't know.
2016-10-26T02:11:31+02:00
Publié depuis Eklablog
Life is so much better when you don't have to rush on anything. I hate to squeez things in between if i'm doing something i'm going to go all out no halfway which is why there are some things i don't allow myself to do anymore or even think about. All the people who are in my life right now i want them to be there if you were in my life and you are not anymore i am sorry but it's for a reason.. maybe you don't know why but i won't be the one to tell you. Maybe you did something to upset me but that's life...you are allowed to walk away from people that for some reason you can't be friends with instead of fighting why not just walk away. YOU DON'T NEED TO FORCE THINGS. you are allowed to make your decisions about who you want in your life by the fact you are supposed to do that. Don't let people come in your life without anything stopping them. You are supposed to lock your door and open it to people you want to. Don't let people control you. You may choose to be kind but don't let them walk all over you and making you do things you don't want to do. I am tired of seeing someone being used and that person don't even know it hell how many times have someone try to use me and i didn't even know? who knows... we all been there and there is nothing we can do some people are simply as bad as they seem. Not everyone is bad we need some positive vibes here but not too much because this blog is not for hearts in flowers...we don't believe in fairy tales...no happily ever after it's just life as it is. We just need to learn and go through thick and thin and maybe we can come to an understand of what life is all about.
2016-10-24T03:31:12+02:00
Girl just to let you know...
Hey there !!! I am not as excited as i may seemed lol *just being honest and more people need to be honest too. Well here's what i am going to address tonight i know a girl who is in a relationship and she is thinking that i am interested in her boyfriend clearly she does not know me ! she can't bring herself to tell me to leave him alone because i don't bother anyone and if she come up to me and say to leave him alone GURLLL i'm about to catch a body! she will get it. One thing i will NEVER EVER do is taking someone's boyfriend or whatever i will get my own boo. Right now i don't need anyone and if you think for a second i want your boyfriend you seriously need to have a talk with yourself and let say i was interested which clearly i am not and i never will be but i am telling you this because i know someone else might be interested and if they are and you are somehow worried well you don't have the right guy you should know that he only have eyes for you and only you. If he somewhat look at someone else, talk to someone else well he is telling you that you are not enough and trust me you are not doing something right you need to get yourself the right guy. I am not telling you what to do by the fact i don't care what you do. For you to think that i am interested in your boyfriend is low even for you. Don't ever think about speaking about me ever again because trust me you will regret it. I am not threatening anyone right now but if you talk bad about me i won't just sit and watch you run your mouth like my name is the only thing you know. I don't even see who she fighting for damn she makes me want to .... uh i have to hold myself i am so pissed right now. It's not my fault that he is somehow interested... it's not my fault that he wants to talk to me but what you don't know is i never let him get close and if you thought i did you are so wrong... i cannot believe it man ! like you think i am looking for a guy right now all i see are fuckboys no offense if you are a guy reading this but some of y'all don't get your act together so don't think i'm gonna go head over heels for you. Thank you i rather stay alone in peace...life is great without any drama. Some of you girls go way too low for a guy like keep your head high he is not worth all that trouble you ain't even marrying the guy.
2016-10-21T03:44:44+02:00
Validation.
hi there i think i haven't give y'all a proper salutation in a while i just go straight to my point but today i am not going to do that. I want to hear from y'all i hope everything is well, for me everything is great as usual. Life is amazing right ! i know you probably have bills to pay, have someone who's sick... by the way that family member i was talking about is doing better i don't t think death will come right now well at least not right away. I have been doing so much better training myself for the worse that could happen but so far only good things seems to be happening and i do not want to spoil that. Have you ever been so happy that you were scared of being sad later and not being able to be this happy again? well i think it's natural to think that but it is also a form of anxiety. We all wonder at times and it is perfectly fine as long as we don't make it as an habit. Well what do i want to talk to you all about... have you ever done something not because you wanted to do it but because you wanted to hear someone else approval or at least get it? let me tell you something...doing something for other people is great it shows that you are helpful but if you don't want to do it well then don't do it just say you cant don't start then leave it because that's not doing the right thing because your mind is not in it. If you are looking for attention or approval you will not get exactly what you want. Do what you gotta do and that's it no attention needed. if you get the attention fine and if you don't get it well hell with that at least you did what you wanted to do. I am not here to judge anyone but i am simply here to speak my mind while a few of you might agree to disagree but i am not doing it for anyone. Having this blog is not a way for me to get attention... maybe i wanted to share a piece of my mind with y'all and having to show some of you what i do when i don't seem to be living in this world. I tend to disappear people who have known me tells me so but i don't believe that. I am just doing me. that's it if that's involve you not seeing me then that's it but the ones who cares know where to find me if they want. I believe if someone want you in their lives they will look for you. if someone want me in their lives well they have a long way to go they better get their seat ready and some tea (don't know why i chose tea but it seems like a perfect fit) anyways back to attention seekers... don't you just hate attention out of the blue like that i mean don't you want to at least feel like you deserve it. Don't get me wrong we all need attention from the right person because what would be the point of living if you don't get any acknowledgment ? we all need someone to talk to and to spend time with. We need someone to pay us attention but not everyone need to pay you attention just the right ones... i don't need to tell you who are the right ones you just know i bet a few people pop in your mind or maybe a special someone.
2016-10-16T14:14:32+02:00
what you don't know won't kill you.
would you rather live your life in total ignorance or in total awareness? to tell you there are some things that won't kill you if you don't know. Would you want to know everyone that would want to kill you ? i hope not because now you would be scared and you will be planing your every move it don't even matter if you were going to die in 10 years now that you know who will kill you it's like you died already.
Talking about dying is not something i like to do and i think most people hate it yet we are the only living thing that actually know that we are going to die. It's crazy isn't it? yet it makes sense. Animals and plants aren't like us. I don't know what's worse i feel like not knowing when you are going to die or if you're ever going to die kinda makes you live without fear. You don't have to constantly looking back if you did everything the right way because you know that you might not going to be here forever. If you know that you are going to be somewhere for a while the first thing you is try to be comfortable. But we don't really know how much time we have on earth so we can't get really comfortable we still have to think about our departure. i am talking about dying for a reason someone i love in my family is on the verge of dying and it affects me a lot... not being there for the person right now... not being able to help. especially since that person is very close to me. I just can't think about it it makes me want to give up... you know. I think you have to train yourself to know how to react to death... i have not learn and i'll probably never will.
2016-10-08T04:38:59+02:00
Trust.
I just realize something that we all can use in our lives some more than others. Sometimes you have to know what you want to do even if it is a simple decision as eating a sandwich or not to eat it...you can start with small things just to train your brain for bigger things because when your mind was set up to chose what everyone else is doing you will be more likely to do so on serious decision because you are looking for a way out. you should be like i want to eat that sandwich i do not care about everyone is eating. You have to know how to make decisions when no one else agrees with you. Someday you may like something that your friends hate so you won't do it because they don't like it or would you do it because you like it? I would do it i don't care anymore i missed out on so many incredible things that i hate to miss out on more things i just want to gain more experience for my writing to grow get better, stronger and into more depth. I love to go through things because that's what makes a writer who writes from the heart better. I am not saying some writer don't write from the heart because everything you think of comes from the heart too that's where emotions are...i could say the memories are somewhere in the brain scientifically speaking but to me everything comes from the heart... that's where your whole life is...you should not trust it sometimes you need to slow down and think because it does not always tell you everything from the realistic view.
2016-10-04T02:35:49+02:00
National boyfriend day ?
I didn't even know until now and the day is practically almost over... There are so many so called days that i can't keep count. I don't really care. All i care about is that hurricane looming through the Caribbean... I really care about that and it is sad that it's about to hit them soon. Pray for Jamaica, Haiti and all the others that i don't mention... I hope it will not do much damage. Back to this day who really cares about today? i mean i am not against it i just don't think it is that important. I think we're so bored so we create random days to fill the hole. Honestly i don't have much to say tonight. I am still working on that project off the social media thing... it's quite hard but i will get there if anything i trust my gut when i shouldn't so i will trust myself to make sure this project succeed.