No bread will ever be baked from this dough

2016-10-21T03:44:44+02:00

Validation.

Publié par Gaelle.R 21 Octobre 2016 à 03:44 AM

hi there i think i haven't give y'all a proper salutation in a while i just go straight to my point but today i am not going to do that. I want to hear from y'all i hope everything is well, for me everything is great as usual. Life is amazing right ! i know you probably have bills to pay, have someone who's sick... by the way that family member i was talking about is doing better i don't t think death will come right now well at least not right away. I have been doing so much better training myself for the worse that could happen but so far only good things seems to be happening and i do not want to spoil that. Have you ever been so happy that you were scared of being sad later and not being able to be this happy again? well i think it's natural to think that but it is also a form of anxiety. We all wonder at times and it is perfectly fine as long as we don't make it as an habit. Well what do i want to talk to you all about... have you ever done something not because you wanted to do it but because you wanted to hear someone else approval or at least get it? let me tell you something...doing something for other people is great it shows that you are helpful but if you don't want to do it well then don't do it just say you cant don't start then leave it because that's not doing the right thing because your mind is not in it. If you are looking for attention or approval you will not get exactly what you want. Do what you gotta do and that's it no attention needed. if you get the attention fine and if you don't get it well hell with that at least you did what you wanted to do. I am not here to judge anyone but i am simply here to speak my mind while a few of you might agree to disagree but i am not doing it for anyone. Having this blog is not a way for me to get attention... maybe i wanted to share a piece of my mind with y'all and having to show some of you what i do when i don't seem to be living in this world. I tend to disappear people who have known me tells me so but i don't believe that. I am just doing me. that's it if that's involve you not seeing me then that's it but the ones who cares know where to find me if they want. I believe if someone want you in their lives they will look for you. if someone want me in their lives well they have a long way to go they better get their seat ready and some tea (don't know why i chose tea but it seems like a perfect fit) anyways back to attention seekers... don't you just hate attention out of the blue like that i mean don't you want to at least feel like you deserve it. Don't get me wrong we all need attention from the right person because what would be the point of living if you don't get any acknowledgment ? we all need someone to talk to and to spend time with. We need someone to pay us attention but not everyone need to pay you attention just the right ones... i don't need to tell you who are the right ones you just know i bet a few people pop in your mind or maybe a special someone.

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2016-10-16T14:14:32+02:00

what you don't know won't kill you.

Publié par Gaelle.R 16 Octobre 2016 à 02:14 PM

would you rather live your life in total ignorance or in total awareness? to tell you there are some things that won't kill you if you don't know. Would you want to know everyone that would want to kill you ? i hope not because now you would be scared and you will be planing your every move it don't even matter if you were going to die in 10 years now that you know who will kill you it's like you died already.

Talking about dying is not something i like to do and i think most people hate it yet we are the only living thing that actually know that we are going to die. It's crazy isn't it? yet it makes sense. Animals and plants aren't like us. I don't know what's worse i feel like not knowing when you are going to die or if you're ever going to die kinda makes you live without fear. You don't have to constantly looking back if you did everything the right way because you know that you might not going to be here forever. If you know that you are going to be somewhere for a while the first thing you is try to be comfortable. But we don't really know how much time we have on earth so we can't get really comfortable we still have to think about our departure. i am talking about dying for a reason someone i love in my family is on the verge of dying and it affects me a lot... not being there for the person right now... not being able to help. especially since that person is very close to me. I just can't think about it it makes me want to give up... you know. I think you have to train yourself to know how to react to death... i have not learn and i'll probably never will.

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2016-10-08T04:38:59+02:00

Trust.

Publié par Gaelle.R 8 Octobre 2016 à 04:38 AM

I just realize something that we all can use in our lives some more than others. Sometimes you have to know what you want to do even if it is a simple decision as eating a sandwich or not to eat it...you can start with small things just to train your brain for bigger things because when your mind was set up to chose what everyone else is doing you will be more likely to do so on serious decision because you are looking for a way out. you should be like i want to eat that sandwich i do not care about everyone is eating. You have to know how to make decisions when no one else agrees with you. Someday you may like something that your friends hate so you won't do it because they don't like it or would you do it because you like it? I would do it i don't care anymore i missed out on so many incredible things that i hate to miss out on more things i just want to gain more experience for my writing to grow get better, stronger and into more depth. I love to go through things because that's what makes a writer who writes from the heart better. I am not saying some writer don't write from the heart because everything you think of comes from the heart too that's where emotions are...i could say the memories are somewhere in the brain scientifically speaking but to me everything comes from the heart... that's where your whole life is...you should not trust it sometimes you need to slow down and think because it does not always tell you everything from the realistic view.

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2016-10-04T02:35:49+02:00

National boyfriend day ?

Publié par Gaelle.R 4 Octobre 2016 à 02:35 AM

I didn't even know until now and the day is practically almost over... There are so many so called days that i can't keep count. I don't really care. All i care about is that hurricane looming through the Caribbean... I really care about that and it is sad that it's about to hit them soon. Pray for Jamaica, Haiti and all the others that i don't mention... I hope it will not do much damage. Back to this day who really cares about today? i mean i am not against it i just don't think it is that important. I think we're so bored so we create random days to fill the hole. Honestly i don't have much to say tonight. I am still working on that project off the social media thing... it's quite hard but i will get there if anything i trust my gut when i shouldn't so i will trust myself to make sure this project succeed.

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2016-10-03T04:22:47+02:00

Got my mind on things...

Publié par Gaelle.R 3 Octobre 2016 à 04:22 AM

I just had a thought and i was like should i leave it here? i am still debating on how i am going to say it in my mind...well it is about technology and seriously i am tired of how i am hooked with some types of social media. I hate it that i have to check my phone every 5 minutes or less it's annoying. I didn't know how annoying it was until i had to be focused for a while you can guess i couldn't stay focused on that one important thing i was surely checking my phone every few minutes. sometimes i just want to log out in all of my accounts and just live my life without all the things that i see daily on my phone. It is depressing that i can't hang out with my friends without checking my phone, taking pics ugh... i hate it so much and yet i do that all the time. I love memories but i have so many childhood memories that did not involved smartphones or any type of social media. I wish i could live without my cellphone, i am learning to live without it but i fail every time... i use my phone constantly...i just hate that i have to check it. I don't know about what y'all think about the whole world of social media but me i stay neutral but deep down i want to quit every social media that i own for a while. No worries i will not abandoned this blog too. I have to try it for at least a month so i can see how my life is because right now i am going on full speed and i do not like it one bit. I want to spend at least a week without taking a selfie or post anything on social media i am just tired of it all. I just want to live my life without capturing it every few minutes... it was cool for a while when i first got the hang of it but now i am an expert and i use it way too much. I am thinking when i have my own relationship i will not post about it. I already knew that i wouldn't i just hate it...we can take pictures but don't expect me to post them and i will not expect him to post anything about our relationship. I don't say that i will never have a relationship i will because dying alone without finding love sucks...just not right now. I have a few things to figure out on my own first. I don't know when i'll be ready but it is not never. Seriously though i hate social media now. I wish i wasn't so addicted but the sad truth is i am and i am trying to go back to the way my life was before all this. My life was so much better and real. I could speak to someone in person and just be in the moment without having my head down instead of paying attention to the conversation. I have to go back to that life because i need to be focused and y'all need to pay more attention to your own life instead of other people. More stuff will happen actually the real stuff not the picture perfect.

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2016-10-01T14:13:36+02:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 1 Octobre 2016 à 02:13 PM

Take a part of me with you

don't leave me here all alone in the rain with the cold as company

i need you to stay

show me everything in your secret box.

when i see the sun rise

i think of you

bright

beautiful yet so far

i can never get close

what i see is what i think of you

why don't you make me see what i don't think of you?

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2016-09-29T16:30:10+02:00

music

Publié par Gaelle.R 29 Septembre 2016 à 04:30 PM

do you listen to music ? i mean not hear really listening to it to a point where it changes your mood... I listen to music so much i think i might be addicted but i'm glad that i'm only addicted to music and not other substances that could be life threaten. But being a music addict is annoying at times.You lose focus sometimes but most of the times i gain focus it can be for the worse or for the best ...if i'm listening to a productive music then i will be.You can't really know what to listen to when there so many songs. I am always listening to something and they all motivate me to do something good or bad. I think music can give you self confidence, when you listen to rap it's all about getting money...party, dancing whatever that can trigger your mood and make you dance or move around like crazy...i listen to everything except country. If a popular song come out i will definitely hear it at some point. Music is fun until you break up with someone or got tired of it all. Those things never happen to me so music is still the fun part in my life and i am glad that i can rely on that. If it was not for music i don't know where i would be today. It just makes me wanna keep going. The thing about music is that it makes you wanna be like someone else. I love to really listen to the lyrics

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2016-09-28T04:00:42+02:00

Eyes don't lie.

Publié par Gaelle.R 28 Septembre 2016 à 04:00 AM

Based on what you've seen so far on this planet we called earth what would you say if you were an alien? I have never asked myself that question until my English professor ask me that question this morning.. Honestly i did not know what to say but i answer i came to understanding that humankind often hide who they really are. I did not say it like that word for word but he understand what i said somehow... I cannot express myself through speaking... I just can't and i envy you if you can. Speaking in a clear way is not something i was good at even though i speak other languages but i feel like i express myself better when i write. Sometimes i would say something meaningful that sound great in my hear but other people be like what? I am sorry actually nope i ain't sorry...we all have something we are not good at and i am not about to sit here and apologize for something i cannot control. I surely can try to be better with my speech problem but i can't promise the results. I think humankind is both good and bad. Some people just know better but truth is we are all bad, we were born to be bad. Can we just change that? sure but that does not mean we can no longer be bad. Have you ever had weird thought like in a grotesque way and you're like wow i am really a bastard... I know i have and i know we all did too at some point. I have seen some people and they actually look like they can't kill a fly but i know it's just a show that they put on. When the curtain is close that's when you see the true faces in silence. There are some things that i have seen from the most innocent people that i hate to be classify as an innocent little girl because that doesn't exist. Don't call me anything, don't tell me i look like anyone, don't tell me where i belong because trust me i have been to places...I have seen some things oh yes i have. Choosing not to speak when no one ask you to and when you weren't been spoken to is something to admire. Some people cannot stay quiet for the world have to know everything about what they know.

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2016-09-18T18:34:48+02:00

Another thing about relationship that i think that i have not mentioned.

Publié par Gaelle.R 18 Septembre 2016 à 06:34 PM

Hello there i took some time to myself the way that i have been going there was no stopping. I had to put a foot down on the ground i had no time to think but i need it. There are some things that we all should face now i'm not here to announced that i fell in love or found someone hell to the nahhh i am not about to settle down quit yet which brings me to my point. my point is some of you have been going out with someone for like 5 years or more whatever...and you haven't really been alone look i am not judging anyone who's been in a long time type of relation, good for you if you have(well i wouldn't know) i am not ashamed of that i'm happy to tell you all about it...when you haven't been alone for a while you will do anything not to be and some of the times the decisions that you make is not the best for you. You need to be alone because when you are alone you learn more about yourself. Hell with relationship goals you're still young you've got time to think don't go ahead and settle down too quickly to regret it later on. If you cannot be alone you are a coward that's what you are. The people who are alone are the bravest they are not afraid to go for what they want when they are ready and they will know when they are ready because they've been alone so they know enough about themselves. Now i am NOT telling you to break up with your significant other all i am saying is that you need time to grow. Remember i talk briefly about that crush i had when i was very very young and the guy moved out of the country well i am glad he did that, i am glad he didn't encourage me into making me believe and i am glad he didn't like me that way because if he did i would have made a huge mistake why? because i was not ready. When you are not ready for a relationship you get hurt. I don't know what kind of relationship you've been looking for because nowadays some of y'all have different types of relationship. I have heard the friends with benefit kind hell is that? some of y'all are that desperate that you cannot wait for a real relationship that you need a friend to satisfied the needs? that makes me sick. Lol you know what i think when someone who have seen me before read this they would be like damn she really is something that's right you can't let people fool you like that... i know i may not look the way i speak but that is for me to know and you to find out. Back to what i was talking about... right friends with benefit thing i saw a movie with that tittle a while ago the movie was alright but they fell in love. Now while you doing whatever you're doing with your friend you don't think anyone will get hurt? well you are soooooo wrong one of you is going to get hurt and it might be you. I don't care if you are feeling lonely or whatever there are some things you can do. You can work on yourself, find a job, make some friends, meet new people all of this is educational and trust me try to take the most out of it you won't regret it. All i am saying is you do not need a relationship to be happy when you're not even 25 yet lol don't mind me. You have your youth don't waste it with broken hearts and dumb relationships. You need to focus on yourself and forget about the world for a while be yourself and take time to find God in the process. I am christian so i am always going to bring God here because i believe there is one God. I don't care what people think of me when i say all these things because those are my thoughts and i decided to share some of them with y'all. I believe if i share everything i thought about this blog would be taken down,which is why i have a phone. I think i may be able to help someone by doing this.You know why i said if you are not ready for a relationship you will get hurt it's because first of all if anyone ask you why you are in a relationship in the first place 5/10 you won't have a good reason...i mean yeah you fell in love well did you?...

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2016-09-12T03:24:18+02:00

Haterszzz

Publié par Gaelle.R 12 Septembre 2016 à 03:24 AM

I think most of the time I post something here it's supposed to motivate me or someone...i can tell you most of the things i come up with here just came to me as i start blogging...sometimes i pause and be like woah ! did i just came up with that. Tonight i am going to talk about haters. I don't know how many i have and if i have any but i know some people may and will not like me and that is alright. The reason why i am talking about haters tonight is because we encounter them everywhere. At school, work, bus, home? ugh i hate this but also anywhere you can think of. To tell you it is not your fault that someone hate you. It's because they can't handle you. What do you do when something goes out of control you hate it or you want to change it right? well some people will try to tell you to change the way you do things and when they see that you are not doing what they say they will hate you for it. You don't have to worry about a thing they will still hate you for who you are and there's nothing you can do to make them love you unless you want them to well that's another story. If i was worry about what people think, say or do to me i will not be here blogging about it. I don't care about all that stuff i have learn in life what my real priorities are and what is distraction and you should do the same if you don't know what you want in life yet. I do not know what i want exactly but i have a picture in my head, at least i can visualize it. I cannot see everything and i shouldn't be able to see everything that is going to happen in my life otherwise nothing is going to be interesting. What i want to say is some people can't stand you and you shouldn't cry about it just live your life and know what you stand for don't let the hatred changes who you are. Don't let anyone change your personality or morals you need to be yourself and you should not be afraid. If someone is toxic in your life you need to let that person go. Don't hold back you need to get the stress that is taking a huge place in your life go. Pray about it, talk about it just don't ignore because be there even if you try to ignore it. The things that you ignore it, it will come back into surface and you will need to take care of it sooner or later. If someone is bothering you, you need to tell them to stop or do something about it. No one needs a bully in their life and somehow we all got one. Sometimes we are our own bully. Don't tell yourself you can't do it. You supposed to motivate yourself and believe in yourself before anyone else does it. You need to give yourself that pep talk and tell yourself that you can achieve anything. If you believe in yourself you will find yourself doing things you never thought you could do. Trust me.

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