No bread will ever be baked from this dough

2020-02-28T18:39:54+01:00

when someone makes you feel unwanted.

Publié par Gaelle.R 28 Février 2020 à 06:39 PM

hey there,

I know this topic is kind of depressing but it happens. It doesn't matter how beautiful, handsome, smart, tall, short you are someone is going to make you feel like they don't want you like they would rather talk to anyone else but you, well this is where I come in from this blog lol.

Okay I have been rejected before (shocking) who hasn't ? well all of us have it just depends the extreme of how you were rejected well I think I've been through it all. I have had people whom I wanted to be friends with that didn't want to talk to me for some reason they thought I was boring shame on them who's laughing now? I'm not i'm just saying lol. Okay when You feel rejected you have 2 options.

you can move on and chose to be around other people.
or you can keep trying to feel accepted no matter how stupid you look.

Truth is not everyone is supposed to accept you, see it this way if not everyone accepted Jesus (who came from above the son of God ) when he was on this earth what makes you think everyone is going to accept you? Don't get me wrong all of us are special but not everyone is going to see it. Some people will reject you because they envy you, some because they can't stand how other people love you, some because they don't want to get attached to you, some because simply they feel like rejecting you. If you chose the first option and you chose to move on and you surround with other people you're the one winning...at first it can be hard to accept someone did not like you or wanted to be your friend but that's okay there are a lot of people who will love to be your friend. You don't have to be stuck on that one person there are a lot wonderful people out there who will make you forget about it you just have to be open to make new friends. You deserve to be happy don't let anyone take away your smile always think that you will forget all about it and soon enough you will meet someone who will erase all those times you were chasing for no reason, accepting things that you didn't have to accept. Always try to see light at the end of the tunnel.

If you chose the second option and you chose to keep trying to be accepted by that person who rejected you. Don't feel weak, sometimes we have to go through tough experience to become stronger. I did that too in the past but I realize nothing can make me be accepted by someone who chose willingly to reject me and not like me. The fact that the person did not like me doesn't mean I am not enough,stupid, ugly it's just that I am not meant for this person but I am still me nothing has been taking away. you are still beautiful, you are still smart and you don't need to be accepted to feel it; you're already all those things. Keep your head high and never ever feel as if you're not enough that's the enemy trying to tear you down... you're a lion, you're a tigger lol all this to say you're strong and you will get over it. Chin up.

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2020-02-27T20:54:55+01:00

Blogging.

Publié par Gaelle.R 27 Février 2020 à 08:54 PM

When I tell someone hey I have a blog if you want to visit I can give you the link and tell me what you think. Sometimes I can almost hear some of them saying "ok like how does it work?" like my blog how did I create it? do I get paid? why do I have this blog. To answer some of the questions I did not create this blog, I had the idea in high school and I spoke to my cousin about it. I gave up after multiple tries but he kept going at it until he stumble across this website and he did what he had to do and boom here's my blog thanks to him

*side note: I do not like talking about how this blog came about because the person who created it for me was my cousin and he passed away... it's still a sensitive subject and I am still grieving.

well honestly there's no science or math equation to how this blog function or how all the contents got here lol I just pick up my laptop and start typing when i don't have anything to say I stay off of it. Like today I don't have much to say but I pick a very irrelevant subject to discuss (lol) just because I want to. I have to be motivated to come here and if I am not I don't I opt for my journal instead so I guess I write for myself when I don't have anything to say to anyone...

I have this blog because I want to reach out to the people who keeps coming and because I want to leave something behind when I leave this earth... this blog is like a milestone I grew up with it ever since high school and now I am in my early almost mid 20's which is so cool. I can re live some of the things I wrote and I can kind off see how much I've grown since then. It's just amazing I can't wait to show my kids this blog when I have them but they must be in high school otherwise it's going to be too much for them lol.

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2020-02-26T04:34:00+01:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 26 Février 2020 à 04:34 AM

Hey there,

This one has no title because honestly I couldn't think of one I just wanted to write this as it was already in my mind. Okay I saw a post online and it says "Not all relationships will lead to marriage, some will help you discover new restaurants" At first I started laughing because it's true for some people they just casually go on dates just for the food with no interest for the person they are out with.

Besides the humor behind the post it's actually sad you know. Like I was thinking the whole point of being in a relationship with someone was not for not the cute pics on instagram just so people could comment "relationship goals" and it was not really about you proving to your friends or anyone that you have a man or a girl...I think It's wayyyy deeper than that. I see relationship as a commitment and I think personally if someone is not in it for the long run they should wait and take some time to get their mind in the right place. I am not scared of the process of being single, you could do a lot of things when you're alone like you can hide things, you can be the version that you try to hide in front of the person you really love and care about just because you feel that you have to be just right for them. When you get in a relationship all that is doing is shed some light to who you're really are, it's showing someone else your flaws, your weakness, your worse days, your fears, you being upset, you being selfish...when you're alone you don't see all of that, you think you're just right until you get in a relationship for the first time you realize how imperfect you are.

Relationship is not always about agreeing on the same thing always. If you find someone who agrees with everything you say it's just boring, there's no growth like you're not learning anything from each other. It's about teaching one another, supporting one another, being there for one another, lifting them up when they're down and that is vice versa, appreciate them despite their flaws, accepting their bad qualities because at the end of the day we are all imperfect and being patient.... So no relationship is not about going on restaurants and eating good foods that is just a bonus.

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2020-02-24T15:46:26+01:00

what you want is not always what you need.

Publié par Gaelle.R 24 Février 2020 à 03:46 PM

Morning ! How are y'all doing? I am alright.

Let's get right into it, no time to waste.

Often times we want something so bad, it could be a material thing, a person,food actually it can be anything. For most humans when we want something we want to have it right away, doesn't mean that we should. Sometimes the things that you want the most is what end up killing you.

Let's talk about material things first, like I know at first you want to buy something or get something however way you plan on getting it but for some reason you can't buy it could be because you can't afford it or you can't have it at the moment. Of course you're going to feel frustrated we don't like being declined for something we want. Maybe you're not suppose to buy that thing now...I remember after my car accident I wanted to buy another car the next day but it was not possible because there’s a lot of factors that comes with purchasing a car especially if you're not a millionaire (ahah) even millionaires struggle. By the way I have nothing against rich people neither am I obsessed with being rich. (that's another topic) Okay so you need time and preparation to have something and to actually maintain it.

What if it's a person. You can want someone today and you can pursue them but if you don't get them don't be discouraged. Move on because chances are there is someone greater out here for you. I know it can be frustrating and maybe that person was going to break your heart but you were saved by staying alone. Don't take it as rejection, see how brave you are you wanted someone and you were brave enough to go after that person you are powerful my dear. Do you know how many people out here keeping their feelings in and dying with it? I would rather spit it out than to die while not knowing if I had a chance with someone. When I know it wasn't a match I feel more at peace and I can move on with no regrets. That's how I see it.

Okay this not about me and my boring experiences. One thing I realize is that it’s not that you couldn’t be with that person sometimes it just means that you’re simply not ready. There are some work that needs to be done in you before you get the person, you still need to grow and you still need to let go of some things. In the process where you are alone and single focus on your growth, try to be a better person but for that you will need God’s help....like I said I am a Christian so that is what you will see all over my blog. I believe in the power of God and I believe that he can make a lot of things that you didn’t imagine become possible in your life. Instead of focusing your eyes out for the person focus on God and your growth; everything else will take place in its due time.

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2020-02-24T01:11:56+01:00

safe place.

Publié par Gaelle.R 24 Février 2020 à 01:11 AM

hey there,

I just want to say how this blog is my place of getting some things on my chest out, however I will not put absolutely everything out but I will put things that can help both me and you out. I will not come here and bash anyone or say what anyone did to me (that's what twitter is for ) lol poetry does it for me...I pour out my pain and love in there. Anyone who's too stupid to receive my love will have that love be poured out on some amazing poetry (that was a joke we don't bash anyone here)

Anyways if you're new here as I did gave my blog to some new people I no longer have my link up on instagram, consider how I deleted it about a year ago. Although you will find my new account on instagram which I created last month it's a matter of time before that gets deleted too, I don't use it...I have no passion for anything like it nor facebook or twitter anymore I guess my view on a lot of things have changed. I really don't like wasting my time on anything...

alright welcome here !

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2020-02-23T06:43:51+01:00

Forgiveness.

Publié par Gaelle.R 23 Février 2020 à 06:43 AM

Hey there?

It's midnight for me at the moment and It's not that I cannot sleep, I can if I want to but I wanted to write this down before I fall asleep and forget everything...

Some people has the power to hurt others not only with their actions but with their words that cut like knives. They may not know how much damage they have caused. They may go on with their lives like they did not just hurt you so bad that you can't even to look at yourself in the mirror, tears falling down your face like a waterfall, heart breaking into million pieces because of everything they've done to you. You can feel broken because of what someone did or said to you. You do have a choice to accept what you want to believe when others speak about you but this is not about being strong right now. Let's say you're totally broken because of what someone did or said to you and you're replaying it over and over in your mind...you know how much it hurts and there's a lot of chances that the person who hurt you don't even know what they did to you and how deep it was.

If you want to heal and if you want to find yourself again, do what I am about to tell you not because I said it but because it's written in the bible. I have been in situation where people hurt my feelings so bad and I pretended that they didn't and that it wasn't all that bad until I came to this process that is called "forgiveness" you will know how much that person hurt you when you about to forgive them. Sometimes I don't have the courage to do it and I admit that I cannot do it on my own simply because it is so hard for me when I look at how much tears I have shed because of this person, but I know for me to be at peace and for me to let it go I need to forgive them. It doesn't mean that I will forget everything but I promise myself to let it go and as time goes by I do forget because I have already moved on I am no longer thinking about it. I have better things on my mind because I was able to forgive and move on.

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2020-02-19T16:48:12+01:00

the power within you.

Publié par Gaelle.R 19 Février 2020 à 04:48 PM

I will admit some days I wake up I don't feel like myself, I don't feel like I am ready to be strong and I want to stay in the comfort of my home just because I feel weak. But guess what I do?

I show up and I will keep showing up because I feel like if I don't show up I will just miss out on something that could change my life. I see everything as a miracle. When I show up I think about it this way:" yeah I'm here, I don't want to be here but yet here I am because I know I need to be it's my responsibility to be in school, or to be in the house of God... All I gotta do is make the best of it, I don't want to smile but I will because it will change my mood and maybe I'll be happier when I leave" that was me talking to myself. I talk to myself all the time to be honest a little too much but that's besides the point.

Reasons why you should show up somewhere you know you have to be is because it's your responsibility to be there. Those places can be school, work, church or house of God, family gathering... you know you have to be there but for some reason you're feeling weak and you think if you stay by yourself you will be safer, you will feel better let me tell you this YOU'RE WRONG SHOW UP ANYWAY. I know it's easier said than done. But let me tell you a little bit about my background story...

I have been in those depressing moods for days and I was at a point where I didn't want to be around people at that time I didn't know any better so I stayed by myself. I would not go out just because I was sad, I used to sleep a lot and I wouldn't eat much. I was really young and at the time I didn't know anything about being depressed, I thought it was normal to just be alone and to avoid everyone. After a while I realize that being alone wasn't much help because I was still sad and I hated it, I used to have a lot of energy always laughing playing around but I started walking around like a sad blob. So you know what I did when I was fed up with myself? I started reaching out to people older than me, I started to make friends even if I was awkward and even if I didn't want to. I started feeling better and I even became part of the girls basketball team somehow I talked my way into it, I know I didn't work my way into it because I never played a game but they loved having me around just because I was funny. Me FUNNY? I didn't believe that my life would change. I still fight the feeling of avoiding everyone and being alone but I know it doesn't solve anything.

Fighting back the feeling of pushing everyone away is not something you battle with once, you constantly have to make a decision to keep yourself going. It will get easier and remember that you are never alone, it will feel like it but you're not alone. Someone is battling with the same feeling you have. Do you know most of my friends don't know this? I don't talk about it not because I am afraid to but the way that I see it to move on from it I need to stop accepting that I am like that, I need to stop talking about it everyday because that's what's keeping it alive. I want to move on and I want to live my life freely. That's the only way that I move on when I stop talking about something and when I don't focus on it anymore.

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2020-02-18T16:43:19+01:00

Publié depuis Eklablog

Publié par Gaelle.R 18 Février 2020 à 04:43 PM

Let me drop this here real quick (LOL)

some of us are not always in happy mood, all giddy and ready to jump off a fence (wait is that even right but anyway..). Although I am a morning person meaning I will get up with or without an alarm because I guess I am ready for the day as soon as put my head on the pillow and I also have the energy to actually get dressed...that does not mean that I have a lot of energy saying "hi" to everyone. Also I am not explaining myself I just felt the need to talk about that because I know that I know that I am not the only one who's like this.

Some people have different moods doesn't mean they hate everyone or hate life. Yo! sometimes I just wake up fully angry and I don't talk to nobody... I don't like when I am like that. I just pray to God to get the anger out because people will get offended for no reason, not that I was intentionally mad. Is that even normal to wake up mad and pissed off? Like I don't know.

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2020-02-18T03:15:43+01:00

catching up

Publié par Gaelle.R 18 Février 2020 à 03:15 AM

How Y'all doing?

I'm alright. I've been taking some time for myself and I have not been writing much on here but I write daily. I am trying to figure what kind of subject I am more focus about. I write about a lot of things but when I start writing I don't focus on one thing, as you can see on this blog I am all over the place. I am not even sure what I'm more focused on, self love? definitely not love consider my situation(which I am totally okay with don't feel bad for me)

You know what on that note I would rather stay the way I am which is happily single, peaceful, ain't nobody asking me where I am and who I am with, I don't gotta keep tract of nobody because I am focusing on myself...that's not the point, the point is I would rather stay single than to be in relationship with a narcissist or with a toxic person who only brings stress to my life and to also being with someone while I am feeling lonely like what's the point? might as well be alone. I know how crazy I can get so far, I don't want a guy to make me even crazier I like the level of crazy I am at. I don't need anyone making me feel insecure, having me looking like an idiot, asking him to love me right, asking him to do the right thing and giving me attention... I am tired.

I have been single but I have been in a few situationships, where I thought I wanted something but really did I want something? I was talking to the person and it looked like a friendship but was it? we both like the other person company but we're both also not ready to be in a relationship like why was I doing that? It was all a waste of time but I learned a lot at least I am not clueless about relationships, I know a few things now which is why I am more experienced on what I want and what I do not want.

Anyways moving on... this is not about relationship stuff right now. I am trying to do other things. Like there is a lot of things I want to share here but at the moment I cannot because they are still in progress but it's about to be big. It's a new step for me and I so happy that I started it but I can only talk about it when I am done.

Also I don't have a lot of time, I am like always tired today was the day I was off from school and so I requested to be off from work too so I have been eating, sleeping, laughing all day at some dumb stuff lol I guess I'm living the life lol anyways y'all have a goodnight I am going to try to get some school work done.

night night.

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2020-02-02T04:11:43+01:00

hey there

Publié par Gaelle.R 2 Février 2020 à 04:11 AM

A lot has happened since the last time I was here. Great people dying and a newfound virus invading China with a few cases found here in the US. I hope everyone is safe out here. Wash your hands as much as possible, I have been sick for the past few days with a cold I am much better now. I needed to rest and keep hydrated two things that I was not doing. I don't have much to say except that I feel totally different about a lot of things in my life. There are some things I used to go crazy for that now I just find them to be pointless. I am in a great place thanks to God.

I don't have anything to discuss this is just to say that yes I am alright.

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